The teacher issued a statement, said that once intercourse, he is not a wolf division. We would like to take this opportunity to speak from the legal aspect of the words of power and habitual impunity, and also from a psychological point of view on the road to recovery, all can do more to change the way of talking about sexual assault, to create a reassuring social environment.
The authoress left, leaving the Fang Siqi text of the glaring burning, the seduction incident burst open in days, to make up for the Church of the Wolf Division, the legislative follow-up requirements of the real-name system, social network victims knocked down by the time no one heard the incident, forced to silence the long voice, with audible mouth, sexual invasion of the safety nets still have many holes.
By the teacher as a means of catharsis, he decided to take the legal process, the lawyer told him that the evidence was not enough to be obscene, that the social worker said he was too normal, not like the victim, who hurt him. Drilling legal loopholes to know that they can safely under the village, years of his mental depletion, the law is not his salvation, the reality of his despair, the incident repeated. (Refer to: ( how the Wolf Division will share the case )
She summoned up the courage to say that she has been the teacher of the years of seduction, invite other victims to come forward, more users of the message with ridicule, read her sow, said she got cheap Maiguai, you are not also have a good? Or blame her for disrupting the family and adultery, this is not your hand-planned fairy jump?
The teacher of supplementary teaching recently issued five point statement, "I am Chen, not Li Guohua", alleged that he is not a wolf division, that has been dating for two months, it is love is not sexual assault, the novel has time and space misplaced and fantasy methods, they have been ruined.
A lot of people, down all the way down. Fang Siqi more than one, the incident more than one, accusing the victim's eyes more than one, the perpetrator of the crime of taking off more than one, the family and the absence of school sex education, adults and children miss sex education, it is time to fill up.
Seduction and the invasion of power: the tearing of the body and the betrayal of the relationship
Let's talk about it from the noun, what is seduction? What is a powerful assault?
Article No. 228 of the Penal Code that impedes sexual autonomy, the power invasion refers to persons who are supervised, assisted and caring by themselves, who use power or opportunity for sexual intercourse, for six months or less, for a period of five years or more, for reasons of kinship, guardianship, upbringing, education, training, relief, medical care, public service, business or other similar relations.
Between the perpetrator and the victim, there exists the relation of subordinate domination, predominance and weakness, and the power invasion is based on the sexual invasion under the trust, intimacy and power relationship, so that the victim can cooperate with or hardly say no in the pressure, and the force of violence makes him violate his own will. (Recommended to you: Lin Yingmeng: Women's sex, when I did not say to, that is not )
"It's not just a story of a girl being seduced or raped," but "a girl who Loves seduction". Fang Siqi doomed to destruction and can not look back, it is because her heart is full of tenderness, she has desire, there is love, even in the end her heart still have sex. 」
The victims of the power invasion, suffering from physical abuse, will feel the betrayal of relationships, the destroyed of trust, the destruction of security, resulting in more blame or pull the contradictory feelings.
I admire and trust the teacher/professor/Parent/boss, he is so good, why do you make me miserable? His hand into me, I hurt, I will not, I do not want to, he has been said to love me, if I choose not to say no, I choose to love him, will this be a person in the eyes of the romantic story?
The victims of the power invasion also face the difficulty of saying the export, at present people's cognition to the sexual assault is very superficial, the way of talking about the sexual assault is very rude, the way of recognizing the victim is very single, but the situation of the power invasion is very complicated. People do not see under such a power relationship, the victim felt betrayed and helpless, only repeatedly asked him, how can you say no, why don't you say no?
"Lori, the Light of my life, the fire in my crotch, my sins, my soul." Luo-li-Tower: The tip of the tongue slipped from the palate three steps, the third step, gently tapping on the teeth. Lola, Lisa, the tower. In my arms, she will always be Lolita. ---"Lolita."
"Think of these days, I come up with the only solution, I can not just like the teacher, I want to love him." The one you love can do anything for you, can't you? Thought is such a great thing! I was a fake from my past. I want to love the teacher, otherwise I am too painful. "Fang Siqi's first love Paradise"
The sexual autonomy and the sophistry of "We have dated"
Rita is not just a text, but a "civilized" and " Rationalization "of the power of the invasion, the teacher abducted female students, boss conspiracy secretary to bed, lead the establishment of the harem in the organization, based on the relationship of seduction, is the tacit understanding of the masculine culture, to power hunting, exchange their own sexual conquest of the record, power is to let their own hair spring aphrodisiac, I want you, whether you want to and not. (Recommended reading: The desire of the seducer and the violence of civilization: Thousands of people who have no say in Rita )
There are many Fang Siqi in the real life, running in different structures. The Labour sector has recently reported a collective assault. Women's Taoyuan, the Secretary-General of the Industry Federation of Trade Unions and cadres for many years to use the power of aggression, organization acquiescence even encourage the culture of aggression.
"They're going to force me to say that I volunteered, I like Yiu Guangzu, want to go to bed with Yiu Guangzu, I do not know whether I am the sex of the flow of people or the faithful so that will now run to accuse is the issue of power, they said all my problems are erotic problems. 」
The most frequent defence of the power of aggression: This is the sexual autonomy of the adult, which is the flow of lust. So no one asked why the perpetrator had to force it up, but repeatedly asked the victim if he refused. How can I refuse? How do you judge a consensus? Why don't you push hard? Why didn't you run away?
Blaming the victim's ideology, and the "sexual desire" of the female victim experience, also deepened the patriarchal society, the female body is regarded as the desire, the right, the sexual object and the victim's established image, has shaped the system which supports the offender.
Therefore, the purpose of lust and sexual autonomy is intended to reveal and diminish the passive situation of women as the object of desire, to actively pursue the subjectivity of individual body and lust, to strive for sexual autonomy and equality, and also to change our attitudes and methods of talking about sexual aggression.
We should say that the misuse and sophistry of the noun of "lust flow" is to ignore the female's main position and opposing voice, weaken the multiple appearance of the victim of sexual assault, and strengthen the rudeness of "do not say not to want".
From the response of Yiu Guangzu and the statement of the teacher, we see another customary, often accepted and forgiven the word, "I really like her", "We have intercourse", "Maybe I have done a bad place", " I have paid for it, as if there were love, and the harm was reasonable, for once I had intercourse, so it was no problem to reach into the body, and the pain of the sexual assault was easy to sin in the name of love.
Such an ideology is terrifying. There was a sexual assault in Malaysia, which was eventually closed because the perpetrator was willing to marry the victim, and the Turkish Act, which allowed sexual assault to eliminate the criminal record by marrying the victim; the Lebanese woman wearing a bloody wedding dress in protest against Lebanese law, indicating that "white cannot cover up the crime of rape".
Taiwan is actually not far away. Do you remember Deng Ruwen? Deng Ruwen was the tragedy of the 90 's, when the perpetrators were strong-married victims. Lina was the mother of Deng, the mother of Deng's years of violence and sexual assault, but also the power, rape at that time only Can Deng Ruwen, forced its pregnant children. Later, Lin-an chess with the family coerce, forced Deng Ruwen married, after marriage continued to abuse Deng and children, and even sexual assault Deng sister attempted. Violence is a recurring nightmare, Deng Ruwen unbearable plight, killing Lin-an chess, just for a night of sleep.
Our imagination about sexual assault and sexual assault is so thin, that love and marriage can be compensated, and that this is a two degree and permanent injury to the victim, did we ask him to do it? Love can never be a round of sexual violence, most of the time, it is unilateral coerce sex, unilateral forced love, and even in the intimate relationship between the two parties, regardless of association or marriage, there is no obligation to have sexual relations, but also may have sexual aggression. (same field Gayon: when you want and she doesn't want to: a psychological study of sex and Love )
A path to the recovery of sexual assault, what are we going to do?
The recovery of sexual invasion is a long road, which needs not only the efforts of the survivors of trauma, but also the adjustment of the whole social atmosphere.
From how we talk about the issue of sexual aggression, beware of nouns misused, to avoid the name of love to take off sin, also do not in the name of justice, meat search for teachers, detailed list, squeeze the teacher's daughter's message wall. The kind of justice that has left many people feverish and fearful of sexual intimidation is replicating the vicious circle of sexual violence.
"Do your father teach you Chinese, too?" 」
"I wonder what you would look like if you were tied to a crab?" 」
"Daughter is so beautiful, dad why not bully the daughter is good?" 」
The man who fights with the monster, does not become a monster, gazing at the abyss, the abyss gazes upon you. What we really need to do is to work together to build a safe environment for the survivors of the trauma, to make him feel trusted and safe and on the road to recovery.
How big is the trauma of sexual assault? Finkelhor and Browne (1986) put forward four types of psychological motivation, indicating the psychological effects of sexual assault trauma, may follow the survivors for a lifetime, let him fear intimacy since then, hate sex, unable to forgive themselves.
Traumatic sexual experience (traumatic sexualization): The victim's feelings and attitudes towards sex are developed in the context of improper and interpersonal disability. The materialization process of being treated as a sexual object may cause confusion, confusion, guilt and shame to the parties. Ochberg used "negative intimacy" (negative intimacy) to show that personal boundaries have been violated and that the original intimacy has deteriorated, and he points out that treatment involves a sense of disgust and shame in dealing with a negative intimacy extension.
Stigma (stigmatization): All victims receive their "bad, unclean, humiliating, and innocent" messages that affect the self-concept they form. Sgroi ET (1982) put forward "bad loss material syndrome" ("Damaged Goods" syndrome), refers to the parties that the physical injury is irreparable or reversal, accompanied by fear, frustration, low self-esteem, repressed anger, the ability to lose trust, blurred family role lines, Runaway, Unable to independently wait for the reaction.
Betrayal (betrayal): The victims found that the people they were leaning on were unreliable, unable to protect or even hurt them. The loss of trust also involves the abuser coercing the other to secrecy, but when it does, the abuser will often deny, lie and deny, and counter the abuser and let the other person feel betrayed and puzzled. The lie that is constructed by the adult world makes them feel that misfortune is self-inflicted, that they are the culprit and deserve it, and that they have a great influence on the trust they have with the opposite sex or authority, and their perceptions of themselves and the world.
Powerlessness (powerlessness): When individual wishes, thoughts, abilities and bodies are repeatedly suppressed, denied and violated, the sense of powerlessness arises spontaneously, not to mention that the abuser often use women's helplessness and dependence as a means of control.
The road to recovery must be set up to focus attention on the survivors of sexual aggression, but also its subjectivity, through the creation of a safe and trusting environment, to give a pipeline of companionship and narration, and then reshape society.
Judith Lewis Herman, an American scholar who studies child sexual abuse, Tiss Herman The five steps of traumatic recovery in the book "Trauma and Recovery", stressing that apart from traumatic individual efforts, the community needs to create an environment in which to help recover.
"The social response has a strong influence on the ultimate solution to the trauma problem," he said. Bridging the gap between the creators and the society depends first on the public's understanding and attitude towards traumatic events. 」
Ann: Find/Build a safe environment to meet your basic needs without feeling scared or afraid.
Say to a trusted object or therapist, tell your own traumatic story, and try to mourn the trauma from the face of the process. The process advises a professional person to accompany (a counselor or social worker) to avoid two injuries caused by improper empathy.
Turn: from telling (or writing) to change their own traumatic memories, see their own life highlights.
Build: Re-develop trust in people and build relationships with people.
Solution: And self, also and past trauma reconciliation, once again to find their own life in the sense of mission and meaning.
"The creators of the people who have seen their experience are looking for forgiveness, fairness, empathy and trying to understand." 」
Of course, we must bear in mind the principle of presumption of innocence, the legal way to blame the perpetrators, but more important, is to comprehensively change the way we talk about sexual assault and trauma, let the victims know that it is not their fault, through school and family education, reaffirm the right to autonomy and positive consent of the body; educating children and adults, Intimacy should be based on democracy and equality, and finally, in collaboration with society, it weaves the protective nets that catch the victims.
It's a long way from companionship and talk to recovery, and I would say that every one of us deserves to go wrong with sex/sex education.