You are too happy to fear loss, afraid to give yourself so pull away. Three intimate relationship exercises for the escapist attachment, don't lose the courage to love for fear of injury.
Whatever happens tomorrow, we had today. No matter what happens tomorrow, at least we have the present.
You are such a person, eager to give the heart but not with the lover too close, if one day does not love, more than anyone to turn and walk away, you do not say too far from the promise of love does not believe forever, only the hope can no longer be disappointed; you always hurt others before the injury, your free and easy only to package their own fragile You still deeply love those who pass your life, but always in the happiness of fear of falling.
Sometimes you doubt, but want to love a person, why so difficult?
Growing up, we continue to love and be loved, learn to establish their own intimate relationship, always ignorant of the pattern of love, deviated from the happy ending of the fairy tales, in the life of constantly picking up a relationship and discard it, everyone is looking forward to the intimate relationship is in fact the attachment type of love. (Recommended reading: Three kinds of attachment patterns that affect love!) To use psychology to find the feeling of security )
The attachment theory (attachment theory), proposed by British psychologist Dr John Bowlby, was originally intended to study attachment patterns and patterns between parents and was applied to adult relationships in 1987. The escape type attachment is one kind of attachment type, the escape type attachment, is accustomed to maintains the distance in the interpersonal relationship, the intimate relationship and the sharing mood sometimes can form the huge pressure to them, in order to evade with the person establishes the intimate relation, they usually chooses the psychological and the physical distance. (Note i)
If you are always in the love feel breathless, want to escape too intimate emotional relationship, always in need of help to be brave, to maintain their independence in love, not limited to love, but always quickly to love the responsibility and commitment to panic, anxious to flee. If you want to love, you have to love to keep just good sweet and greasy, can love, but not love too close.
To your general escape attachment,Dr. Loretta G. Breuning in the psychology of intimate relationship to put forward three love in the practice of the subject, love may not need to, as long as the earnest effort for Love is enough.
We will love and be hurt: try to accept what you need in love
You always think that do not rely on, one day if the lover leaves, oneself still can independent, the sky does not collapse, you still can in love a overturned, prop up oneself. You put on a layer of defense, too soft heart if not seen, there will be no piercing day.
Try to express your needs in love, you can feel weak in front of a lover, need a shoulder, you do not have to use a person's strong to resist too great sadness.
For the avoidance of attachment to the practice of the subject, put away to protect their own spines, understand that a relationship requires mutual trust, you do not have to entrust tomorrow to who, but can try to love with the lover to give themselves, the interdependence of nature feel at ease, this is the basis of stable relations, from the trust of the partner to explore the vast world. (Recommended reading:"for Your Song" The Essence of love is, even if you can't go to the end, but also hard to love )
"Love Summer 500 Days" stills
If he makes you feel free: Don't doubt Love's heart
With the fear of losing one day, he is a finally let you in love to become a soft person, to caress your preparedness to let your sadness flow, to believe that he walked a long way in life, holding the Shen Dian sincerely to this, just for with you in love.
Look into his sincere love you in the eyes, not to doubt the love of sincerity, nor for the uncertain future give up the courage to love.
To escape the attachment of the subject, if he like a glimmer of light to illuminate the most claustrophobic place in your heart, try not to excessive analysis and anxiety, feel the temperature of love, let love grind to each other angular, find the most suitable angle, you can finally with the lover deep hug.
Love, so willing to say unrest: Try to communicate rather than escape
Love in the people, have the worry of the outcome, you always for their wayward feel annoyed, he always because you feel defeated, why love each other but always hurt each other, you seem to cross a long distance across, longing for love but not love each other's heart.
Do not let the uneasiness separate the desire to hug each other sincerely, because want to love well, so willing to say those most uncomfortable uneasiness: I am afraid, because too much care about you.
The subject of practice for the evasive attachment, try to say your doubts and worries about love, use communication and love practice belong to your tacit understanding, say your worries, also respect the right of the partner to maintain self-awareness, with the love of tolerance, the difference between the thought, the process of repeated communication, only to continue to love. (Recommended reading:"single diary" I deeply need you, light to keep you forever )
It would be a privilege to have me heart broken by you. It will be my pleasure to break your heart. --"The beauty of Life"
Regardless of the type of attachment, we continue to experience love and being loved in our lives, a person's life, if there is such a completely give himself, in spite of heartbreak, but also the most beautiful in life, this love lets you know yourself, originally, you can not keep to love a person, for him to feel heartache, feel the Pulse beat, To be reconciled to one's own strength:
This is my sincerity, here, all to you.