A love letter to a graduate: your difficulties have to be solved by yourself.

Dear Graduate,

This love letter, from a very important to me a story about it.

After I started working, I had a discussion with my mom, and after a long, long time, I still remember clearly, to some extent, that night affected a lot of my later decisions.

It rained that day, I and my mother into the café in Yongkang Street, café, only our table guests, count very quiet.

At that time I have just been a year of work, to be honest, all unfamiliar, nothing too will, bite the bullet. I graduated from the Department of Foreign Languages, because of internship experience, accidentally stepped into the media circle, the company is a new creation, do a full of thorns, explained also very difficult, I lost a lot, no self-confidence, no choice of the emboldened. I was in a mess, especially to my mother, I kept asking myself whether I had not become her imaginary daughter. (Recommended reading: write a letter to yourself after 20 years of age: Be the one you admire )

That night, lined with quiet scenes, I confusedly asked my mother, "I choose to do things, will you feel disappointed?" "My mom looked surprised and asked me," How could I think that? I shrugged, "I always feel like I've been reading for so long, you want me to go a more formal path, a better achievement, a more beautiful title." 」

My mother quiet for a while, very seriously look at me, "perhaps, I just can't bear you hard, reluctant you to take a tortuous road." But you want to do what choice, if it is you want, is you decide, mother think is good. My mother's eyes almost red, worried about her daughter's mood written in the face.

At that time I know, the original mother also read the article about women, but also with friends to introduce me to do, as I do, she also felt that the explanation is very difficult, and occasionally want to daughter why they live so hard, how not to take the easy way. The easy way is obviously also some.

Pictures | source

I found that the reason for my pelting is that I imagined a typical, family-revolutionary, parental expectations of their children, and then repeatedly tortured themselves with this imagination, saying that I am very painful.

That night, the small Café good magic, there is light through, we red eyes, closer to each other, I incredibly also closer to myself. Later that day, I chatted for a long time. It seems like the first time I've shared with my mom about this job, what I believe, what I'm holding on to, what I'm afraid of.

While I was combing myself, I found that it was a very powerful thing to say, this process, grow an honest texture, the body will remember, how you honestly know, see, understand yourself, so do not be brave, not blame, not wronged, not remorse, I am what, is what, I believe what, do what is a complex thing to do, but intuitive to do.

Because of the integrity of the texture, so can be steadfast in doing things.

All my efforts, and not for anything else, is to be more close to what I believe, after graduation, I often think of this picture, feel grateful, thank parents let me do a person responsible for themselves, but also thank themselves, the choice of the road is not right and wrong, no matter the pros and cons, all have scenery, also have a subject.

So dear graduates, happy graduation, future days, you just have to write your own story, it is beautiful enough, you can only write your own story, just enough strength. We are all the people who write stories, the world is a huge study, its scenery varied, different styles, attention, and therefore beautiful. If I can give you a story on this road, or give you a little direction, I would say,

1. It takes time to know yourself, but it's always worth the time

Knowing yourself is a very abstract thing to hear, and not only that, but also the low value of CP. The way to know oneself is endless, but it is the basis of judgment that we make choice. The choice is always your own. The longer you get older, the deeper you get about this.

I've heard an exercise method, choose a piece of white paper, and write down three characters that you most often experience, for example, to ease the family atmosphere of the daughter, hard to survive in Taipei petty workers, angry citizens of society ... and so on, and then think about what these roles mean to you, if you can change, how would you like to change the role of the narrative? What kind of role do you want to go through? In the process, there is self-awareness, and there is a long hidden "what I really want." (Recommended reading: The most honest commencement speech!) David Forster Wallers: "You make a choice for yourself, you really have a life")

Only know what you want, believe what, fear what after, can make to their own honest choice, also just defying comparison, growth belongs to their own time axis, live in the speed of their own acceptance.

2. Don't be afraid to deal with your life issues, and don't forget to take good care of yourself.

Image source: Author self-photo

To know oneself is to make a choice, but also to take care of themselves more appropriate. You know what you need, how you want to meet your needs, you know where your emotions are, and what your emotions reflect your inner anxieties and desires, and you know that the gateway to life is actually a good reminder, inviting you to come back and think about yourself.

Really, everyone has their own life issues, there is always a wall, there are always cards, there is always a hindrance. You are not lonely, but your difficulties, can only be solved by yourself, only meaningful.

And whatever you do, taking care of yourself is the first priority. Because you are the only one who has the responsibility and obligation to take good care of yourself.

3. The process of trying to accept the results is a necessary exercise

There is a common discussion as to which of the processes and outcomes is important? It's important, but the reasons are different. The process is important, is to accomplish, fully try to enjoy the efforts of the process, to maintain flexibility, to develop their own muscle; The result is important, is to accept, things than expected, as thought, how to deal with loss, how to practice losing, how to get up, how to start again.

A lot of things in life are actually like this. For example, the project failed, also such as sudden breakup, there is no wrong effort, but after efforts, may not have a harvest, at least to be able to accept the results. Life is long and the next inning is about to start.

4. Maintain independent thinking, but be kind and gentle

You are an independent person, have their own thinking, the importance of independent thinking is to develop your view of things, your response to the perspective of the world, accumulated into you can not shake the beliefs and values.

But independent thinking is not the weapon of rejection, the kindness and gentleness, especially the people who treat you differently, your circle of life and the stratosphere, who have their own way of living and living. The world is not only a set of rules, a logic of operation, to treat different gentleness, is to support more space.

5. Cherish the relationship, save time for the people you love and love You

Image source: Author self-photo

Hey, you are not a person to work hard, there is support for you, there are people with you struggling, there is love you and loved you, the universe you are not alone. Cherish the relationships you have, keep the time for them, nothing else, because if they are important to you, you should deliver the love they deserve.

The essence of love is freedom, after love, will be richer.

6. Be thankful for the day, it's important to live well

Be busy also remember to pause, again tired also remember traveling. It is important to have a good life, to enlarge the senses, to embrace emotions, to make a complete point in every moment, to laugh completely, to cry completely, to love completely, to lay down completely. You will also have complete freedom. (Recommended reading:"Female fans say work" a professional worker, to know how to rest )

Finally, to your experience of the days of gratitude, or good or bad, work not Tang donated, all the past will return to your own, no pity.

Finally want to give you, or blessing.

Bless you on the way out of campus, fearless to grow yourself, and your problems, your emotions, your desires, your knowledge and do not know to stay together, this is you, your life, your story. Do not be afraid, no matter who, also walk on this road.