The foundation of parenting is love! Three milk father confession: The father's job is irreplaceable, I want to fight for it

Written on Father's Day, the former Taiwanese society stressed that the male outside the main female, many people's childhood, looked at father's back grew up.

However, with the universal concept of gender equality, men's investment in housework and childcare is being discussed, and more national legislation is needed to give fathers the right and security to apply for paternity leave, allowing more men to jump off the traditional social framework, communicate with their partners, and take responsibility for family care.

Parenting has many forms, but its foundation is love! Whether it's a mother, a father, or both, it's not the point of contention, is it? Despite this, the fact remains that fathers who remain at home for childcare are still in the minority.

According to the Guardian , the Australian Institute of Family data shows that in the past in Australia, fathers and partners had the right to two weeks of paid leave; in the UK, only 2% of couples had shared parental leave, and the British government launched in 2015, allowing two parents to share 50 Week's vacation and 37 weeks ' salary.

The United States, which is the only developed country (developed country), lacks the policy to ensure that a newborn's father or mother has paid leave.

Therefore, in addition to cultural factors, whether or not the State policy to give the father considerable support, but also affect their participation in the housework one of the factors.

In another example, German legislation stipulates that during the 14-month parental leave period, the father must take two months, and in only two years, the proportion of men on maternity leave increases from 3% to more than 20%. After Quebec also launched a "daddy-only time" plan, more than 80% of fathers accepted the offer.

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Father on maternity leave: Bring equal partnership, children grow up happier

Studies have shown that the benefits of prolonged paternity leave can be extended to the entire family unit. When fathers extend paternity leave or take up primary care roles, there will be more equal relationships, more dispersed domestic work, fewer divorces and more satisfactory sex life reported by couples.

Children who grow up in an equal partnership tend to be happier, healthier, better at school, more confident and less likely to have behavioural problems. Girls tend to choose a career without gender stereotypes, and boys can have and build more equal intimacy relationships.

In addition, the mother's future salary can be increased by 7% if his father is on vacation every month.

Excerpt from the Guardian article, share with you three of fathers, explain why they decided to stay at home and play a caring role. Also expect you to think about the relationship between father and child in the article, to understand the personal interests of men to care for their children.

This is not to attack men who are not involved in housework, but to encourage change of culture in order to create a better social atmosphere and environment for other men, so that fathers have the choice to have a comfortable society and mechanism to accept him when they are eager to take time to look after their children.

Mike Dwyer: Being a full-time caregiver is the most lasting, positive change I've ever made.

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I recalled that after 12 years in the office, I chose to assume the role of the main caregiver, realizing that I had not had a day of pride in my career. In the future I will say to my grave:

Yes, the decision to be a full-time caregiver is a lasting, positive change in the world. Life is too short to know whether to make the right choice, but make sure you know why you do it.

I am in a privileged position and my friends are in touch with and understand me, so when I go into family care, I don't get it from the people around me. "The reaction, which is a great help. But for other men who want to take care of their families, there may be stress in the process and some mental health problems. Just as a mother falls into postpartum depression, it is likely that a man will have the same experience when he becomes a full-time caregiver. Especially when you feel isolated from the past, it is very challenging.

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Anyone who wants to be a major caregiver will think, "It's great, I get a lot of encouragement, I take care of the kids very well." "But think, if your partner stays at home with the kids, will they be encouraged?" Hardly, because taking care of children is seen as something that should be. (Recommended reading: full-time milk dad Chen Tingyu: With a big daughter, pull a baby car run marathon )

We do need cultural change, and I think it revolves around the status of gender issues, whether they are directly related to parents or not. Violence against women and women is less paid than men, and I think this is part of our common need to change and grow as a society, until women get equal opportunities with men and earn equal rewards for their efforts, and to achieve such an egalitarian society, I think it depends on education and the economy.

Equal parental leave, regardless of gender, is the kind of cultural change that makes society change, and that promotion is a gradual, even dozens of-year process.

Richard Hedger: We are same-sex couples, parenting is lucky and a start

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We are gay couples and have a beautiful three-year-old daughter, Scout. I am a freelance photographer with our partner Paul has a studio in Surry Hills.

With children, family life is not without challenges, but this is the whole of life. As a pair of same-sex couples, we encounter a surprise study with any family unit.

Obviously, society is gradually paying attention to male caregivers, but I believe it has happened for years. No matter what sex, the family unit has many kinds and multiple. As social thinking shifts, people will begin to realize that the primary care role can and should be implemented by men and women. We are challenged on many occasions, but so we become resilient and react accordingly.

Personally, I would like to see some official changes to simplify the official document.

We found ourselves in various health care organizations, unable to fill in the Father's form, because all the questions were made only for the mother. When it comes to child care, nutrition and general health, you will soon find that the form does not include a father, which is mainly for women.

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As parents, we cherish every moment, longing for every milestone. "Oh, wow, she sits up!" She's turned over! She's just taken the first step! 」。 As a family, we often associate with friends with children of the same age.

If possible, we will participate in Rainbow Family and gay dad community activities. Scout will experience and understand the diverse family structure of our society in the process, which is very important to us. Scout and I attend several local courses two times a week. Music groups and sports groups, usually followed by parks, zoos, playgrounds and even beaches.

There is still a long way to go in LGBTQIA rights and interests. It involves not only marriage equality, but also equal rights and discrimination. There are many groups and areas of society that suffer from many kinds of discrimination and do not receive the same degree of visibility as marriage equality-especially across gender, gender diversity and bisexual issues-but that does not make them unimportant. (Recommended reading: Three gay family's moving confession: "Admit my family, hinder who's happy?" ")

In the future, we hope to have another child, a Scout brother and sister. This is a long and long process, there will be no heartache. Our daughter is great, as a parent is amazing. Her presence is absolutely joyful for us and continues to amaze us.

We are really lucky that this is just the beginning.

Rory McLeod: Hugh Paternity Leave, which is a very healthy thing for your mind.

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I find it seems more difficult for dads to take paternity leave.

So, in my organization, I support people who come to me for advice and try to change organizational policies to make them more suitable for families. Both personally and professionally, I have seen how difficult it is for the family to start childcare at the first time.

But this is not always the case, and many men in relationships do not want to take care of the role. Sometimes they only spend a week or a few days, that is, back to work place, let mother stay at home, face a very small child alone, with all the challenges that have to face.

This is an unfair situation.

Especially with two children, the situation will be more difficult, but by communicating with my partner, coordinating each other's career planning and taking turns in caring roles, the children will be able to establish an equal relationship with us. They don't see our "traditional moms and dads" role. My daughter is 11 years old and she talks to her mother as happily as I talk about school plays. They may see me cooking dinner, or washing clothes.

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I think it is a very healthy thing to put some value into the family environment.

I would say to the other dads, fight for any paternity leave they have the right to enjoy. And not just accept it, once it's over, it's over. This is a full-time job and it is an important task. This may be their most important role as young people. Knowing the values they give to their children is as important as their mother's values, and they deserve to fight for it.

Although changing the scope and flexibility of legislation is a big project, men have a longer time to devote to family care-especially in the first five years. Let the men into family care, as a society, we benefit-we will raise more down-to-earth children, and, to tell the truth, I think this growth process, will make the boy better.