As a lesbian, the biggest "identity crisis" since sensible is probably "whether I am T, a woman, or a Pure (both)?" "And recently, Hong Kong is popular called No label, the original 70 years of the United States has already appeared."

Wen | Hong Kong Mission Kayla

As a lesbian, the biggest "identity crisis" since sensible is probably "whether I am T, a woman, or a Pure (both)?" "The label of these identities directly affects the dress and manners of a lesbian, and the colloquial saying has a cloud." "Dress is the most direct way for us to express our character and gender temperament, and we can deconstruct a person, or even a group, from the symbol of dress," he dress.

In the traditional Lesbian label classification, if it is T (port called "tb"), the typical "uniform" may be a bunch of breasts, trousers and a short hair on the ear, "Iron T" will not have chest fat, some would prefer to be "more like a man than a man"; standing next to T, perhaps a long-haired sister, Or a hearty girl with a long and long hair, but they are still more like a girl than t""; As for Pure, appearance may swim between T and the "masculine/feminine" of the woman, and the choice of spouse is not necessarily limited to girls with the opposite characteristics. And these volume label classification popular period, probably in the author around 14 years old, at that time is 2008 years.

However, these have been relatively "outdated" concept, in 2018 today, the author used in Hong Kong's lesbian dating App, or in the reality of social, to "t//pure" to categorize, for many lesbians are a bit "old-fashioned." A new word that appears in the ring, "no label", just reflects lesbians ' boredom with two of dollars in gender roles. In an age when sexual orientation is also becoming more diverse and more words are described, lesbians and even women will no longer settle in stereotypical gender roles and temperament labels.

"You can't label yourself, you can't accept yourself too feminine."

In the second year of college began to realize that he is an unapologetic lesbian, only have a desire for girls. So I want to learn to be a qualified lesbian and establish myself as a Billie Jane? identity.

I started trying to be a "less girl girl"; born with a bit of plump breasts, I bought a sports bust, flattened the chest that once provoked butt in puberty, and breathed a sigh of relief: "Finally, I'm no longer being watched by strangers because of my chest." "In the subway station popular breast enhancement ads, magazines for women on the size of the review and highlight, as well as in the middle school because of the chest and female students spread" fake dog, draw the attention of boys "injury, in that moment ugly culture seems to leave me.

I went to a chain of boutiques to buy a light blue shirt, a gray wardrobe, a black pullover, because I saw the girl I liked wear it that way. I used to wear slimming clothes, because my mother said "girls to wear waist-fixing clothes", and mother-in-law since my development have loved to praise my body: "Your hands and feet are very long, waist is also very good, is the boys will like." "Buy men's New clothes, of course, I can only wear XS or S yards, and like the loose cut of clothes, in addition to because I want to become neutral, secretly can and" boys will like the girl "identity farewell, and I would like to be" girls will like the girl. "

But I still keep my short hair, and I haven't cut my hair to the length of my ears. Sometimes, I would like to turn nail polish into red, but soon blocked by myself: "When a type of lesbian, neutral girl, can not be painted women's things."

By the summer, I started putting down the idea of "I don't want to be too feminine," wearing a vest and slightly revealing the gap between my breasts. However, neither of these is my satisfaction, I feel that I can not be a T, also do not want to be a woman, the head and soul at the same time masculine at the same time feminine, but the appearance of I can not find the expression of the exit.

"How do I wear it? "Is it about" how do I position myself? "The question for lesbians is," Am I feminized, masculine, or between the two? " "And for women, the question of wearing a ride is actually about" how I want to be seen, "such as" reducing feminized traits in the workplace to get attention "or socializing" to add feminine traits to highlight glamour, "and even to" take a comfortable "balance between masculinity and femininity. The former relates to "pleasing others", while the latter is "pleasing yourself".

The revelation of nail polish and perspective lace tops

Last fall, the author's two lesbian friends dressed up, let me reflect on the "female characteristics" of the possibility of return.

Picture |last Friend Stills

Friend T and I met when I was working as a gay organization in college, and three years ago she had short hair on her ears, always a plain white blouse with trousers, and white cloth shoes. She was as neutral and less feminine as the lesbians in my mind who thought they were "qualified" and "attractive." Three years later, I found her hair a little longer, and her short hair on her shoulders added a gentle glow to her, and it was a bit like me. To my surprise, she happily painted pink nail polish and said triumphantly, "one day I went shopping with my girlfriend to buy nail polish, and I painted it." Doesn't it look good? "It turns out she tried nail polish in an experimental nature. Afterwards I blamed myself for the fuss and the series of struggles I had for applying nail polish. In the face book, I saw her wearing a picture of pink clothes, and the next few parties, I observed that her temperament and look as if it were different from before. Did she cross that rigid neutral demarcation, too?

Friend Y is a fashion industry worker and used to be my interviewee. She loves all-black dress up, loves McQueen and Vivienne Westwood, and loves Grace Jones. I have a distinct outline of the five senses, is a neutral girl with blonde hair, very beautiful and very handsome. Once went to the nightclub, because it was on each other's birthdays, her dress also became "grand"; the usual black vest was replaced by a black perspective lace jumpsuit, foot height with boots, and a suit coat. In her, I Saw "sexless" (sexiness), and her choice of lace blouse revealed that she did not hate her "feminine traits" and so-called "women's things."

Over the past few years, I've been groping myself "what it is" and "what to wear," and the only clear thing about me is knowing what kind of girl I "like." Hairstyle alone, I have changed two, from the "Clear soup noodle" in the middle and long to "Pulp fiction" Mia Wallace's browsing Sea Bob hairstyle, to the ear length of all-back short hair. What I realized was that I loved myself when I painted my cat's eye line, and I loved myself in neutral clothes, so I was not as good as the two.

Hong Kong Billie Jane? is popular "no label", the United States of the 70 's has appeared

In the lesbian dating App such as her, the author has read several declarations on his personal file that "no tb." and "i ' m not tb.". TB is no longer "attractive" in Hong Kong's lesbian community, and for Billie Jane?, more than 20 years of age and younger, TB is even synonymous with "previous generation": wanting to be more like a man than a man, helping a female partner pay for meals, is like copying the customs of a patriarchal society once into a lesbian relationship. According to the observation, the "no more identify with the so-called label" women, with a little "androgynous" temperament, both masculine and feminine women, is the son of the desire to get or become the "new neutral."

The aversion to "tb" may reflect Billie Jane? 's boredom with stereotyped gender roles, as well as a desire for mobile gender roles and temperament. Former lesbians get "symbolic penis" by "playing" men, just as women in the former 80 used to gain respect by "playing" men.

However, in Shishun's "sex, High heels and Woolf: A History of feminist polemics", it is pointed out that scholars Sue-ellen case once put forward the role classification of lesbians ' "t/, even if the" male/female "gender stereotypes are copied, seemingly" self-integration "into the patriarchal system, but in fact, at the same time subversion of gender stereotypes.

It may sound paradoxical, but the case is that the masculine lesbian is the "penis display", while the feminine lesbian is the "female dress Up", the two together in the sexual or loving relationship "plays" its role. The author boldly assumes that as long as lesbians realize the object of their desires and how they are desires, they can flow (or rotate) to "play" the "upper/lower", "s/m", "masculine/feminine" position in the relationship. This may be one of the reasons why lesbians have experienced several "style modifications" in their lifetime.

"Supermodel first person"gia Carangi as early as the 70 's interpretation of the androgynous gender temperament, she in addition to wearing Giorgio Armani suit interpretation masculine "t", also in Helmut Newton in 1979 took the photo of "woman."

Photo |gia Carangi

The costume came from YSL, and the two men in the photo were both women. Robin Osler, who was wearing a suit and short hair, was ambiguous in lighting a cigarette with Gia, who was wearing a skirt and long hair. In reality, both Gia, as a lesbian, and as a woman, have fully rehearsed the neutral temperament of Mobility and no volume label.

Now, because the economy can be independent, I also have more clothes in my wardrobe that I like. There are tight trousers and dresses in it. There is a black suit coat and leather coat, as well as a woolen coat to fix the waist. Having a baseball hat that makes me wear it when I don't want to tidy my hair, and a beret, makes me happen to be a "French girl." Shirt has the father does not wear the men's big code style, also has the texture to be fluttering female money. There are red lipstick and eyeliner in the makeup bag, and the eyebrows must be brushed before you go out. When I ask a friend around me, "What kind of woman am I?" "Friends will say," You are definitely not very t, but not as for a very feminine G, between the two. " 」

Every day out of the door has a different appearance, sometimes feminine and sometimes masculine. More importantly, I no longer mind that my clothes will reveal the lines of my chest, nor will I stop myself from wanting to apply nail polish on a whim.