Cai Yilin released the latest MV "Brain Gong" to the 80 's classic Hong Kong film tribute, in addition to adding witty port elements, but also to explore the "ideal lover" is not really suitable for their own; at the same time, Mrs. Youtuber Science has released a collaborative film with the writer Denny's sister, discussing the desire to find the ideal object before, We should all find ourselves first. We all know that as long as we fit each other, you are my ideal lover.

"My brain, where the hell is it?" 」

In youth, there have been more or less moments: shouting the idol male star "Brain public", the brain thinking about when to wait for their perfect lover. After class time and 35 close friends gathered around watching the most popular TV series, scrambling to be the actor's "Brain Woman."

Fantasy good love fell from the sky, Prince Charming in front of the show, corner can meet the ideal lover, we are not allowed to come to the field of earth-shattering love story, the whole person drowned in the bubble of love. Then we know that the real love, there is no bubble, but there are more beautiful. There is such a "brain public" tells us that the true love of the good, perhaps far more than the fantasy bubble came to touch the heart.

The gap between ideal and reality

"Brain Public" a song from Cai Yilin's latest album "UGLY BEAUTY", directly will express the "husband" of the current popular term "brain" as the name of the song and throughout the song, describing the mood of love partner and worship lover's vision, in a solid, all can show sweet details are written into the song.

Trying to call you a brain-brain male.

Every minute, brain, brain, male, brain.

Always accompany me love me pain I hold me

Recently released MV also with images to respond to the song want to create the situation, but the MV plot can see different from the lyrics, the other definition of love. by Cai Yilin as a film actor captivated, eager for love of the woman, invited Hong Kong actress Wu Junru as "goddess of marriage" for Cai Yilin to find the ideal companion, but also please go to the Chinese male star Zheng Kai played has been in Cai Yilin side, did not notice the "fate of people."

Photo | Taken from Cai Yilin's face Book

In order to fulfill Cai Yilin's wish, the goddess of marriage called out the actor one by one in the film, including the characters of gambling gods, zombies, salty egg Superman and other classic port films are turned into real characters in front of Cai Yilin. But, after all, the film is the film, originally thought to be the perfect lover's actor, how to know and Cai Yilin is so unsuitable, interest, ambition, lifestyle is not the same.

Because of the hazy beauty produced by distance, let us all misbelieve that is love, a plunge into the fog to see the real face-even if the other side meets their own standards of all the criteria and how? Ideal type does not mean that it will suit oneself.

Before you fall into the vortex of love, think clearly, is your ideal type, is also suitable for your type?

Perfect self does not exist, perfect lover is also

Before Cai Yilin's other new song "Strange Beauty" MV released, she once publicly said that "the pursuit of perfection is bullshit, no one is absolutely perfect, to pursue perfection, I will never catch up." If "Strange beauty" is to uncover the fact that the perfect self does not exist, then "brain public" is to discuss "in fact, the perfect lover does not exist" situation. (Recommended reading: Cai Yilin's "strange Beauty" talk about appearance anxiety and embrace truth: "Who is qualified to define good looks? ")

In addition to Cai Yilin, the 2018 rapid Red Youtuber Science wife released the day before the film with the writer Denny's sister, also discussed the "ideal object" standard, in the film Mrs. Science mentioned a way to judge whether the other person is the ideal object of their own, that is, "first know themselves, understand their own needs"

Picture | Screenshot from Mrs. Science Youtube Channel

Although many people know that in the relationship, there is no ideal object, the perfect lover exists, only the most suitable for their own, can make themselves feel comfortable at ease with the people. But why do we still expect an ideal object to emerge? Let's start with a psychologist's discussion of "self."

Karen Horney, a psychologist who Karenhoni in his book "Conflict Within Us," is different from Freud's "self, ego, super Me" personality division, and she believes that "ego" can be regarded as the self-image (self-image) that we form in our life experience. The self-image of the individual represents a person's view of oneself, Karenhoni believes that because each person's life experience is different, will develop three different self-image:

  • Actual self: Refers to the combination of people in the current state of mind and body, representing the actual appearance of a person.
  • Real self: Refers to the space in which a person may grow and develop, representing a person's inner potential.
  • Idealized self: Refers to the self-image of a person jumping out of reality, imagining a future goal, representing a kind of appearance that a person wants to achieve, and can satisfy his inner self-expectation. idealized

Karenhoni. Picture | Source

Among them, if we extend the "idealized self" to other people, that is, "externalization", the role of externalization is that we set the ideal at the same time, and did not find their own inner transformation, but the things that happen in the heart as the experience of the outside world. For example, we are eager to have a stable quality of life of family life, as long as the other side of the conditions in line with our desired "stable life", we are likely to ignore other advantages or disadvantages of the other side.

So, to put it bluntly, the ideal object is our projection of the ideal life, but perhaps the ideal life we "Imagine" is not really suitable for who we are now.

Is Gauguin a happy ending? That's how the movie plays.

At the end of Cai Yilin's "brain Public" MV, Cai Yilin finally realized that the love she had been longing for was around, playing the actor's Zheng Kai also from the meat roasting shop chef into a "high rich handsome", the girl's fantasy bubble of good love finally has a landing, as expected to obtain "brain public."

Picture | Screenshot from "Brain Public" MV

"Brain Public" MV to the 80 's classic Hong Kong film tribute, Link tail also refer to the movie finale, so that the actor has a big change of identity opportunity, seemingly humorous plot settings let fans call fun, but if the MV seems to be the perfect ending in real life, we may find one thing:

Must it be Gauguin to get the perfect ending?

Is it possible that you are simply you, that I am still me, that there is no dramatic change, and that there is no need to suddenly kill out the identity shift. Just the two of us, working together to spend the rest of our lives, the next day to cry and laugh? (Recommended reading: not only Gao Fu Shuai and silly white sweet!) "W Two Worlds": Knowing Love, you know how to survive )

The former female high school students gradually grow up, no longer with the heart of the girl to call the idol star "brain public", they learn to understand their real needs, one by one to find a really comfortable partner to get along.

In a classmate, the girl who entered the scene the deepest is now holding another hand, they look at each other, the eyes revealed: "We are not perfect, but we are together in the days, let us all live very beautiful, although there is no perfect life, but it is enough for you to spend the ordinary together." 」