Some parents, who are always overly anxious or involved in their children's lives, like helicopters, hover over their children all the times. Take a look at this animated short film "Bao," produced by Pixar, which was shortlisted for best animated short film of the 2019 Oscars to explore parenting issues between parent and child.
The animated short film "Bao," produced by Pixar, was shortlisted for best animated video from the 2019 Oscars. The story kicks off from a bun to explore the relationship and emotion between parent and child.
The director of the Bao is Shi-Pixar's first Chinese female director in more than 30 years. "bao" means that as the protagonist of the small buns, but also with the "treasure" formation homophonic, implicit Chinese society often said "mother Bao", "Father Bao" meaning. (Recommended reading:"Ding Juan Column" Afraid of children suffering, and afraid of children can't eat bitter "mother Bao" phenomenon )
A Chinese couple living in the United States, one day to eat breakfast, the soon entrance of the small buns suddenly live, like a newborn baby. Mother Love, began to cherish, take care of small buns. When it is undernourished and becomes soft, the mother quickly feeds the stuffing; it also takes it to the vegetable market to buy food, exercise and become a part of her life.
Small buns gradually grow up, began to more self-awareness, it is no longer the mother in the arms of the whining to learn the language of the baby, but become lively and mischievous. Gradually, they had a lot of strife and discord. When the small buns and friends play happily together, the mother feels dangerous, do not let it and friends continue to travel, while the mother hard to cook a table of good food, small buns would rather choose to go out with friends.
The real blast point is when the little bun takes the blonde girlfriend home and tries to move out to live. The mother and the little buns were at loggerheads, and the mother, in a fit of rage, ate the little buns in a straight gulp. Afterwards, the mother was very remorseful and sad, but it was too late. She sat sadly on the edge of the bed, hazy, and she thought the little bun was back; in fact, the figure was his own son. It turned out that she just had a dream, and the little bun was her image projection of her son.
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Helicopter parents: constant hovering, and your anxiety
Is such a story familiar? Helicopter parents, when raising children, are always overly anxious or involved-like helicopters, hovering over their children all the time, focusing on their children's every move.
Especially in Chinese society, most people still have the traditional idea of "family-centered", in order to strengthen the relationship between family members as the main goal, rather than the emphasis of the Western society on the realization and development of individuals, and then affect the way of upbringing.
Excessive protection, from a parent's sense of insecurity, may be a fear that the child is being spoiled and bullied. In fact, parents worry about the starting point is good, because of fear of children's physical or mental injury, so build a protective network to reduce "foreign risk", but parental protection, may inadvertently, but also become a source of stress for children.
In addition to protection, some parents are often involved in the size of their children-even though he has grown up. Perhaps because of the expectations of children, or hope that the future of their children's life will be good, as long as children are slightly behind others, parents will do their best to help complete, from schoolwork to life, take care of all the proper stickers, so that children less failure, more success.
In fact, children can learn how to solve problems in the process of frustration. Maybe the child is not as good at facing the predicament as you think.
Too many "rescues" of parents may instead deprive their children of the opportunity to think. Moreover, failure is not necessarily a bad thing, not to mention that success and failure are always defined by others. (Recommended reading: Dear Mom and Dad, maybe the happiness in our eyes is not the same as what you think )
The helicopter pulled away before the child could see the blue sky
Adults often think that they have more experience in life, listen to their own right, but if too many ideas put on the child, easy to backfire, will also cause parent-child relationship tension-parents think that children do not understand their own painstaking, children feel that parents are difficult to communicate and get along. If parents really want their children to grow and thrive, they can listen to some of their children's voices and help give them nutrients that are right for them.
Helicopters around the child's head, seemingly perfect to protect their baby, but accidentally ignored, in addition to the top of the head, the child may still face other "attacks" from all directions in the future.
Instead of doing all the supporting measures in place of the child, teach the child how he can be prepared and have the wisdom and courage to face the challenges and difficulties.
The blue sky, obscured by the shadows, may be another new paradise for children. After all, the outside world is not only dangerous, but also has the opportunity and the possibility to flourish.
At the end of "Bao," the mother packed up tears awakened from nightmares. She took the initiative to pat her son on the shoulder, and the two snuggled up to each other, letting go of their past displeasure with each other. Finally, the mother chooses to believe and bless her son's feelings.
Family and finally had a good reunion meal.