He is a boy with light, good appearance, excellent education, good people. I don't want to say I'm climbing him, I don't think I'm climbing. But in the process of getting along with him, I became very small. When people think that my boyfriend is better, the more I seem to let this relationship fail.
I find that people always think I've "picked up treasure". That's easy to understand, isn't it? In most people's eyes, he has many obvious advantages, and I am just an ordinary girl.
I don't want to say I'm climbing him, I don't think I'm climbing. Such a truth, I understand. But I gradually realized that in the process of getting along with him, I became very small.
B and I have been dating for more than two years. Since I know B, he is a bright boy, good appearance, excellent education, good people. I admit that when I first started dating him, there was a little bit of pride in his vanity, especially when i introduced his boyfriend to others;
When it comes to arguing, B always insists that what he says is the best; B said he wanted us to discuss and come to a conclusion, but in fact, he wanted to conclude that I agreed with him. I was too weak to hold my ground and always choose to compromise in the end.
Pictures . . . . . . . . .
"Some people's love is only for one person / He loves very frugally / But love very long / Some people are born poor / He can't love anyone / There is no way to grieve" - Some people love thrifty some people are just poor, Pam Bercow
"That day the class meeting, we are talking, your boyfriend is very handsome yes!" "High school friend sat in front of me with coffee, "Is he still a student?" 」
"No, I graduated and didn't last long. I said, "Why do you know how he's growing?" 」
"You have po on Instagram! We also point to his personal page, he graduated from the W Big Money Department? 」
"Um" I tried to hook up the corners of my mouth, holding the coffee cup slightly tightened.
"Well! I wish you all stability. You don't make it well later can be your lady! She smiled, winked, and her tone was full of envy and blessings, but I was uncomfortable.
When people think that my boyfriend is better, the more I seem to let this relationship fail. I was so afraid of the relationship to die, I was too afraid of him to leave, I wasn't even sure if I was going to continue to socialize with him for the wrong loser, or if I really still loved him.
Relationship Psychology: Low Self-esteem makes you emotionally vulnerable
Have you ever been wronged in a relationship? Or do you often feel that you have been wronged in a relationship, but how can it still seem to be inseparable from each other?
Jeremy Nicholson M.S.W., Ph.D., a psychology specialist, analyzes the interaction between self-esteem and emotional relationships.
In Jacobs, L., Berscheid, E., and Walster, E. proposed the "Self-esteem and attraction" article, which explores whether a person's self-esteem has any effect on accepting the love or feelings of others.
The researchers looked for a group of male college students to increase or decrease their self-esteem through personality tests. The researchers then asked a group of female students to express three different responses to the male's dating invitation, "rejection," "ambiguous" or "accepting." Finally, the evaluation of male students to female students' preferences and acceptance. The study found that men with low self-esteem were more likely to feel good about women who were willing to date themselves because they were less likely to be denied.
In Rudich and Vallacher's study, low-self-esteem people tended to be shy err and may have social anxiety, and their need for a great sense of belonging had to be met. "For example, when low-self-esteem L's life is around, there is an A willingness to establish a relationship with himself, and even if A demeans L, L, who is a low-esteem person, will still want to engage or develop a further relationship with A as long as A is willing to date L."
That is, your affirmation of self-worth may affect your position and state in a relationship.
So what will make your self-esteem lower? Jeremy Nicholson M.S.W., Ph.D. presents several possibilities:
- Compare your mind with others and ignore your uniqueness.
- Treat "rejection" as a failure or lack of value, rather than re-seeking a more suitable opportunity.
- In order to gain the recognition of others, they do not show true self, thus weakening the relationship with their own.
- Lack of clear life goals makes it difficult to create meaning and value for life.
Be kind to yourself, to be kind to your relationship.
Before you find a partner and relationship that suits you better, you need to face yourself first. In fact, all relationships are built from the beginning of knowing themselves. (Recommended Reading: Uncovering The Small Self-Esteem Under the Giant Mask: The Psychologist's Self-Healing Course)
If you're also a low-esteem person, here are two Tips:
- Focus on your unique values: encourage you and play more with your uniqueness and positive power. In fact, in the long run, these unique traits make it easier for others to notice you. There's not just one way to generate attraction. Instead of competing narrowly with others, focus on developing your own unique strengths.
- Find out the ideal relationship state you desire: In a relationship, what levels of you desire to be satisfied? If you don't know what you want, it may make it more difficult to pick the right partner. So take a moment to think about what you most want your partner to meet? What traits are your priorities? Only when you really understand what you need can you find the other half that is right for you.
"He can't understand, I don't love him, I just have no way to love him the way he wants. I want to go my own way, step by step with their own pace to go down. I have decided to face the world in an independent manner and the future. Would rather be a little hard, rather than attach to who, hitchhiking, watermelon big side. "Taipei Girls", Xu Weifang
You are humble in love, struggling to swim. You love his beauty, but you lose your light.
His front with a sharp thorn, stabbing you full of wounds.
"Every day you're not happy is not yours / You just waste it / No matter how you live / As long as you're not happy / You don't live" - Every day you're not happy is not yours, Fernando Pesso
To, in a relationship, love yourself as a low self-esteem of you. Your love need not be humble, a person who really loves you, will not let you love down. The best relationship is that you hold hands and accompany each other on a journey, and the best love will not make you inferior and embarrassed, will only let you grow up in the relationship, love soft and soft. (Same Show: A Girl's Letter to A Future Boyfriend: Will Your Love Make Me Grow?) ) )
Enter a relationship, to let each other grow and thrive in love. Don't forget, you can have your own voyage.