"We Can't Be Friends": Ten years of dating to talk about marriage, he'll just tell me "it's not the time"

The 2019 Taiwan drama "We Can't Be Friends" is a matter of relationship. Some love, come at the wrong time. So we pretend to be okay, press down on feelings, and try to get back on track. Yet these third people, like mirrors in relationships, contrast and amplify the "wrongthings" of long-standing relationships. (Same-on-the-spot:"We can't be friends": 30 years old, in addition to marrying a stable partner, Can I have a happier life?) ) )

Yan Kexuan and Gao Zixuan, dating ten years to talk about marriage, he always said "not the time", and she always struggled to force. Until that day, he met the "preferred person".

If it's you, would you choose to let go for the "might be better" for the one that even he said equivocally. (Extended reading: Breaking up after eighteen years together: Promises are not marriage! Thank you, don't marry me)

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Gao Zixuan: Ten years of dating to talk about marriage, he will only tell me "not the time"

The pair are such lovers.

They have been dating for ten years, appearance is right, his career has been successful, she is gentle and gentle. He promised her mother that she and her sister would "take care of her for the rest of her life." She gave him all the details. Many people envy her for not having to go to work, shopping all day, shopping for meals, and spending her boyfriend's money. But they do not know, in fact, in this relationship inside the love, one-way and hopeless.

Her heart was absent from her for a long time.

"Our outdoor wedding, don't book this restaurant." There was dinner, she said to him.

He asked slowly, "Whose wedding are you talking about?" 」

She replied happily, "Of course it's ours." I even have a wedding dress, a ring, i've already figured it out. 」

He mused, but I didn't even propose.

Her goal in life is to be "Mrs. Gong". She does love him. But because she couldn't get love, she demanded anything she could. She had long thought the two would get married, so she arranged everything from wedding swedding to buya-house, to her boyfriend's network. For Gao Zixuan, she poured all her life's youth and love on this person, hoping to change to the eternal commitment of men. But do not know, such love invisibly also caused the other side of the pressure. (Extended Reading: The older you get, the harder it is to break up?) To give your intimate relationship health check-up sheet)

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Emotional blackmail: If the other half treats me as a business and says, "It's all for me"

"Everything I do is for you. 」

He often wondered why his girlfriend was always like a terrorist lover, controlling, arranging all kinds of things for him, and finally tweeted, "All things are for your own good." When love becomes a power relationship, it always makes him feel suffocated.

Sometimes he even thinks that Gao Zixuan just thinks he's running his fashion accessories, or even his own business.

"Don't say it's all for me, don't say it's all for our future." By doing so, you will only pull us further and further away. 」

For him to ask the general manager's wife to eat, to help him prepare clothes for work, even the contents of his contract want to manage. He said, in fact, you do not have to work so hard, she said no ah I am not hard at all. "And, Mom wants you to take care of me and my sister-in-law." 」

In Gao Zi's body, we see the shadow of emotional blackmail. She kept using time, emotion, and past promises to make it clear that she must not betray her.

However, in an emotional relationship, the more you pay, the more you can get it. The so-called love, is not unilaterally believed that the pay is the equivalent exchange, but to be able to know each other's location, grow together. 人生中有很多自我成長的機會，所謂好的愛情，並不是在關係中失去自己。(Extended reading: Girl's letter to future boyfriend: Will your love make me grow?) ) )

True love, can you change time?

After breaking up with Mr. Nguyen, Gao was still in pain. Why have she been dating for ten years, she has to be thrown away like a broken toy. She looked for the "small three" Zhou only theory, but zhou only friend Han Kefei blocked, the two people dispute. She scolded Corfi: "I am Mrs. Gong." 」

But Fei said, "Miss, what makes you say you are Mrs. Gong, your boyfriend every day outside the girl, you can not control, and said he is Mrs. Gong." 」

When she got home, she again argued with the rocker. He also made it clear: "You are just a son, not a mrs. Gong." 」

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It always hurts her. Ten years of feelings, really say that broken can be broken? Everyone seems to be shattering her dreams. And she still chooses to live in the illusion of love, not because she is stupid.

Live in their own world, because sometimes, that is less pain. She likes the man, she put the whole young love of the man, love others. The man who eats and wears all is willing to take care of her, must be true love. How could he betray her?

After all, Mr. Gao did not become Mrs. Gong. She doesn't love her, and what about herself? Perhaps, to some extent, she was just living in her mother's last words that she wanted to "take good care of her." Words are like curses, they give us expectations, but they limit us.

In episode seven, her sister, Gao Zixuan (played by Chen Qi), finally decides to tell her sister the truth. (Recommended reading: Actors are easy sad creatures!) Interview with Chen Wei: I am full of M, need people to wake up )

She said, Sister, don't say that The rocker is my sister.' It's not that I don't give you face. But sister you can't escape any more. Are you nothing without The Kjork? (Extended Reading: How do I stop liking someone who doesn't love you at all?) ) )

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When "I" becomes "we": you don't have to be Mrs. Gong, you're Gao Zi

We don't yet know what the story of Gao Zixuan's later story will be. If one day, because of the differences in the imagination of the future to separate you, please do not forget that each other once deeply loved the part. As we all know, you've tried.

Perhaps Gao Zixuan has not yet understood, sister's words are correct. From who's wife role to leave, back to their own body, what is needed is not more effort, but stop and understand themselves.

The play is popular not only because it is a third-party double-split moral drama, but also because it also reflects two very different couples, how to adjust, when I became "we" before and after the discomfort and fear. If, after all, love long-distance can not be replaced by true love, if, emotional blackmail also can not replace his patience again, in the face of such a love end - you have the courage to admit to kill out?

After all, a mature love, after all, will not be just to satisfy one of the fantasies. Even if this relationship doesn't give you a result, it doesn't mean you'll never be loved.

To my dear Gao Zi, you do not have to be Mrs. Gong, but forever, you can be yourself.