"We can't be friends" "If you don't, why don't you refuse to be good" Why are we angry with Zhou?

Since the release of the Taiwan drama "We Can't Be Friends", the audience has been hotly debated about the heroine Zhou Yu (Guo Xuefu). Zhou only has a stable relationship, and talk about the married boyfriend, the appearance of a third person Yan Kexuan (Liu Yihao), let her began to waver. However, the plot until episode eight, she has been wandering between the two, delayed making a decision.

The scolding on the Internet has not stopped. Some people say she has a stable boyfriend, why cut? Some people also think that since they don't want the love of the khow, why not refuse? Zhou's indecision and difficulty in confessing caused a lot of criticism. Behind this, however, it actually reflects our anxiety about gender roles in relationships.

We're going to talk today, what makes you unhappy with Zhou?

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Have a stable partner, not satisfied, is not my problem?

Some people say, Zhou only to her boyfriend Li Haoyi (Sun Qijun), how so indecisive. When she clearly had doubts about the relationship, but also took the ring, repeatedly delayed, let the other side misunderstanding, create hope. Is this treatment a waste of people's time?

But here, we can also see that behind these "blames", we are actually angry about the demands of girls in the whole society.

As a girl, from small to large, we were taught to have a good love, and then good marriage. Just like the play's Zhou, now has a stable boyfriend, he also put my future planned, I should feel satisfied.

Many times this is the case, when we find that we are not satisfied with the immediate relationship, but because this society constantly blackmail stake girls, youth is very short, good relations are not easy. So you will in turn doubt yourself, reflect on yourself, is not I asked him too much, is not I too ignorant? If I'm a little unhappy, isn't it, what's wrong with me?

The audience who is angry about Zhou is, on the one hand, projecting such social demands, and on the other hand, she is unhappy in the play, there are other options - the appearance of Yan Kexuan, so that Zhou only has the opportunity to leave this fog. But most of the time, we don't have this kind of "good luck". (Same-on-the-spot:"We can't be friends": 30 years old, in addition to marrying a stable partner, Can I have a happier life?) ) )

How much does it cost to pursue true love?

However, we continue to see that the only aspect of Zhou can not let go of Li Haoyi, on the one hand, and dare not accept the knuk. She kept pushing the mistake on the man, saying that you were going to be close to me, that you were willing to provoke, and that we were always just friends. In contrast, he was able to break up decisively with his current girlfriend and boldly pursue true love.

Some people will say, Zhou only how dare not be responsible for their own, their own mistakes are other people's faults? Why can't you choose decisively and want and dare not say?

Source: Screenshot from "We Can't Be Friends"

Further, Zhou's anxiety also reflects gender anxiety in the relationship. She doesn't know how much the consequences would be if she let go of her relationship and chose another one. Whether it's moral recriminations, hurts and embarrassments in an original relationship, or hesitating and uneasiness about a new relationship; knowing that that's the love you want in front of you, are we really encouraged to pursue it?

The same situation in the case of the kwong, but also a different scene. He has a girlfriend for ten years, but he can understand that he doesn't want the relationship, break up decisively, and then pursue another true love. In contrast, we have to be dissatisfied with Zhou, said she did not know what she wants, simply hold everything in the hands; (Co-star:"We Can't Be Friends": Ten years of marriage, he will only tell me "not the time"

Today in a relationship, we found that this is not what we want, but also found that boys and girls have to pay the same price.

When Zhou was only scolded as a "bitch", also make you uneasy?

When we talk about love, you know that you will hurt others for yourself;

We face a troubled feeling, the heart will have hesitation, tolerance, blow, want to leave but no determination, want to start over and not sure; In this play, Zhou's emotions and behaviors, though full of moral shock, are also true.

Source: Screenshot from "We Can't Be Friends"

So, when the public scoldzhou but a bitch, chopping is wrong, you will see the real lyser, is really disturbing, is real life, we may have fewer choices. Her indecisiveness, like a mirror in the field of relationships - especially this society's demands on girls, will make us truly free in our relationships?

Zhou, who is still relatively lucky in the idol drama, also has a knhewein if she doesn't want Li Haoyi. But in real life, most of us don't have this kind of luck. Most of us are only in limited conditions, trying to squeeze into the ideal life frame. However, also want to tell you that if the original love is not what you want, you can summon the courage to let go, because you do not have to love another person, to jump out of your unwanted relationship, or to achieve the life you want.

If there are many moral dilemmas in love, you can choose to be sincere with yourself first.