Last weekend, Lin Shuhao in a sharing will mention his recent basketball career setbacks, can not help but shed tears and said: "Today came to you, my heart is broken." He showed us that in a society that just likes to celebrate success, the real bravery may be that you can stop just saying, "I'm fine, I'm fine" and start saying, "I'm really bad."
Most precious is that you will confess to yourself that when the world doubts you, you can no longer doubt yourself.
"I've lost 17 three-pointers in a row, and when the playoffs started, I didn't have a chance to play, but we got the championship, it's okay, I can stand up." Then the free market came, and this was the last straw to crush the camel. 」
Lin Shuhao was invited to a waiting art sharing event in Taiwan last weekend (7/27). He said he doesn't have a team to go to in the NBA this year, and is getting further and further away from "wanting players." A sentence "life is really hard", fell into tears.
A lot of times, we only see the bright side of public figures, we just like to celebrate, cheer and smile. But perhaps we need an occasion where we are no longer just announcing good news, or chanting heart-to-heart, heart-to-heart inspirational stories;
And most importantly, the courage to acknowledge vulnerability will make you truly strong.
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"Can you cry if I fall down?" It is true courage to recognize vulnerability.
In many media reports, talk of "the NBA "abandoned" Lin Shuhao, "Lin Shuhao in the free market facing the "dilemma", and even began to dissect the reasons why he has not yet found a new owner. These titles, as if to prove the social general view of failure, lies in the results theory - no NBA, no initiative to choose, is the failure of the career. However, in addition to the difficulties he encountered at this stage, where to go next, we can see more is how, as a much-anticipated star, he stepped onto a 3000-person speaking stage, confessing his uneasiness and frustration. What he wants to say today is that we encounter life experiences that are rarely discussed more often than the aura of success. (Recommended for you: Read The Power of Failure: When you are willing to face failure, you can grow rapidly)
In our growth process, is usually taught to fall can not cry, is the concept of courage. Over the long term, we are used to hiding our negative emotions. Tears as children can be blamed by parents, grow up crying in front of others, and embarrassing everyone; We are not used to expressing emotions, nor are we used to accepting them. In the long run, only more internal injuries have accumulated. And most of the time, we don't know how to digest these traumas.
And in the overall happy or unhappy social environment, Lin Shuhao today admitted to bear the reputation of good tired, frankly often want to give up. And at the same time that his huge negative emotions were conveyed by the microphone, it aroused a sense of empathy among the audience; someone red-eyed at the scene, someone on the internet in solidarity with support. So, instead of causing embarrassment, his tears inspired more courage.
"After the playoffs, I'm coming to Asia, and to be honest I don't want to come, because I have to smile every day, I want to share the feeling of the championship, I don't really feel i deserve it, I don't know if it's the future I want, I feel ashamed."
"When I was young in the NBA, I felt Like I could find my place in the NBA, but now I think a lot of things is about giving up. I always say to myself that if I have a son, I won't let him play in the NBA. He doesn't have to face these reputations, he doesn't need to let everyone see his frustration. .
When the public is encouraging success, encouraging goodness, encouraging falls, you should climb up again, no one tells you that frankness is actually an exit; So, the real bravery is that you can stop just saying, "I'm fine, I'm fine" and start saying, "I'm really bad." (Recommended Reading: Personality Psychology: "Staying Weak" Makes You Courageous)
Sometimes you work hard, but your efforts don't work.
"I actually train more hours a day than anyone else, more than a lot of NBA players. ......。 But when I needed to hit the ball, all the training didn't come true. I see other players who don't train that much time, but they play well and score a lot.
"I try to be a good teammate and support others, but in the end, those things don't feel that important. By the time they make a choice, I'm a good player and that's something, and they don't seem to care. In order to make my life a glorious life, I try to be a table like a person, in public how, in private how, but in the end everyone seems to don't care about these things, they care or others see you. .
The second reality that is also mentioned in Lin's share is that sometimes you work hard, but hard work doesn't always come with results. You may have put a lot of effort and a lot of effort into it, but you still see how successful other people's lives are and how successful you are in their own failures.
He continued, there was a saying that when you hit rock bottom, you had to climb up. But for me, the bottom of the valley seems to get deeper and deeper every year. Like in our lives, you often think you're at the bottom of the valley, but there's always a lower level. You will feel the so-called challenges of life getting harder and harder.
When people just tell you to climb up, so when you've been working hard for a long time and haven't made progress, you're starting to wonder - isn't it bad for me? Is there a problem with me? However, we know that when setbacks come, it is often mixed with a variety of coils, all kinds of diffraction problems. All uncontrollable factors make it more difficult, and that may not make sense.
And someone has to admit it. Real life isn't just an inspirational route; you don't have to deny yourself all the way you can't do anything about it. In addition to the spiritual chicken soup-style inspiration, it must be admitted that in fact, life is there will be a lot of failure.
Back to yourself: "When you know who you are, it doesn't matter who you are"
But even if you see a lot of injustices in life, even if life is low to the bottom, the most moving thing about Lin Shuhao's sharing is that he wants to tell everyone that even if you have nothing, you still have yourself:
"My heart is broken when I come to you today. I may never be the player I want to be, but I can still have freedom. When you know who you are, it doesn't matter who you are. 」
In a free market, he feels that where he can exert his power, for example, he has to work harder than others, and indeed when he works harder, he has been given the opportunity to be appreciated by different teams. Yet at the same time he felt powerless. He continued, "The free market is tough because I feel like the NBA has given up on me." I always felt that if I gave them a chance to doubt me, they would doubt me. Like Murphy's Law, when you deny yourself first, you are really denied by the world.
Life is a lot of times when no one has to admit who you are. Whether it's in the workplace, in emotional relationships, or even within the family. You will know that there are many things you can't master, but no matter how far you go and how much you pay for it, the only thing you can and must master is yourself. Don't lose yourself. Because when you know who you are, you will always have a chance to save yourself. (Guess what you want to see: Find the real target!) Lin Shuhao's graduation speech: Don't exhaust the pursuit of a lifetime, and ultimately only empty)
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"So waiting is a lot of pain, those who are waiting, I tell you not to give up, those who work but do not return, do not give up." Don't give up on those who are pursuing God but do not feel the existence of God. If God wants me to cry in front of the crowd, I do. What I want to do most is not the best players on the pitch, but to share all my frustrations here. If you don't give up the meaning here, I do. 」
Many public figures will tell you what it's like to be successful, but few people are willing to tell you what failure is. At this moment in front of our eyes, Lin Shuhao, is no longer the "Lin lai crazy" myth that comes and goes on the court; Not only does he talk to you about failure, but he also talks to you about how sad you are to fall here.
And we will eventually understand that myths don't grow, but it's okay to acknowledge the fragility of courage. What you want to know is that life will have a lot of troughs, but you begin to express your self-reliance and admit that hard work is sometimes useless, and at the same time, you've begun to accept yourself. So when no one wants to give you any certainty, when the world doubts you, you will no longer doubt yourself.