"Common Girl' To See Growing Up: If Being an Adult Is learning not to be myself, Then I'd rather Be Childish

"What did I do wrong?" What did I do wrong? I'm just wrong, I want to be an independent new woman! 」

Be a good adult in the eyes of the world? What's wrong? Why does she try to keep up with the rules, but she doesn't get the life she really wants? In "The Common Girl", Chen Jialing quit her job, shed her relationship for many years, talkabout about the boyfriend of marriage, did not leave any way back to himself. She talked about how much she was in the world, colleagues buy groups, she buys everything, but also every month to donate money to stray animals, but they have fallen to the point of four.

Chen Jialing's appearance, like every social effort for many years, but feel that they have nothing to gain from the sixth-grade girl. The world does not allow us to be capricious and expects us to mature. So we pretend to be the "adult" this society looks forward to, clearly hate the ex-boyfriend, but in order to show that they are a mature atmosphere of people, hard is to pack a red envelope of twelve thousand;

It's not good to be a new generation of women, pretending to be a mature adult, even worse.

Photo : A photo of the "Common Girl"

What is an adult like, can 39-year-old be like a child?

We, in our 30s and 40s, may have this anxiety: I'm 30/40, I've worked for years, I've been married and have children (or i'm single), but I feel like a child inside. This feeling, thinking that when you leave school at 24, it will gradually disappear. But no, it has been pestering itself until now.

You pretend to be very mature, in fact, the heart is afraid of taking responsibility, often hesitant, do not know what they want, occasionally more revealing a little childish behavior. 39 years old, like a child can not do?

According to a 2013 BBC report, psychologists have confirmed that the definition of the age of a transperson should be changed from 18 to 25 in the future. After that, the outpatient clinic for children's psychomedicine will also be expanded to accommodate 25-year-old patients.

You might say, it's 25 years old Hey, I'm 30, 40 years old, should I have an adult feeling?

"The notion that 18-year-olds suddenly turn into an older person is wrong," says Laverne Antrobus, a London-based child mindologist. My experience is that many young friends still need support and understanding. 」

People joke that this is a giant baby age, but we should look into it more - perhaps growth never needs to set a tipping point.

Knowing to accept yourself is when you become an adult

The Atlantic In this article, "When is it to be an adult?" , the text mentions:

"Adulthood is a social structure, and so is childhood. But like all social structures, they determine whether they need to be held legally responsible for their actions, what role people should play in society, how people see each other, and how they see themselves. But even with the differences that seem to be able to demarcate by law and physical development, "adulthood" is difficult to define. 」

Photo : A photo of the "Common Girl"

An anonymous source wrote in the article:

"In the past, I've been waiting for the moment to be an "adult", and Now I'm 27 years old, married, living alone, working as a manager in a restaurant, and I'm looking forward to these processes making me feel like I've become an adult. But in retrospect, I was wrong. I don't think it takes me a lot of time to be a kid or a teenager, I start edifaed from 13 years old, my parents are immigrants, I'm the translator of our family I think a lot of times, we've become adults, but we just don't realize it. 」

We all have the same growth process, experienced confusion, vulnerability, willful, low self-esteem, we often think that the so-called adults, it should be indestructible, but in fact really let you become adults of the moment, is you decided to start to accept their own good and bad, all this has nothing to do with age, even 50 years old, even 50 years old, You can allow yourself to fail helplessly.

If I grow up to learn not to be myself, Then I'd rather be childish.

Now you, still for themselves not like an adult and anxiety?

Another anonymous person in the Atlantic article said, "I don't like the word "adult", like the synonym for "death", and the Buddha is saying goodbye to vitality and self." 」

It's a little difficult to change the way society is thought right away. Dad mother expectyou a little bone, relatives and friends think you want to live a successful bully, if this is the definition of modern people grow up, then would rather be childish, but you can be very comfortable to do their own. Or, by your own definition, an adult can have what it looks like!