Make a "sex itinerary" for each other? Will it help intimate relationships by prescribing when to have sex? Your troubles, let's answer.
When you think about your 20s and you're in a relationship, you're always interested in relationship scares. You have desire, you have time to have sex, and usually your partner does the same. To embrace intimacy, you hardly need to work hard, or even feel like it's going to happen naturally.
However, after a long relationship, or after getting married, you find that there are always many things in your life waiting for you to deal with. Housework, work, children. For sex life, do not know why, slowly become a luxury. Or you may not be happy today, and your partner's chances of being "frequent" with you may be small. And these are very real situations. (Guess what you want to see:"No ejaculation, because love is less" Couple smlots late at night: talk about the boy's "Dry Orgasm" dry orgasm)
But don't be too quick to get frustrated. To increase intimacy, several psychologists and sex therapists have recommended that partners draw up a "sex schedule". It's just, even having sex? To do this may scare you a little; it's like saying that our relationship is already so bad that the sex between us has been declared dead, so we have to dictate each other in a formal way. What you can think about, however, is that today is not that you don't want intimacy, but that it's really hard to have "natural sex" in the long run.
Today, let's talk about why sex schedules make you more satisfied with your relationship.
Photo : "Love Medicine DoesN's Medicine"
The "Knowing that there's finally a night that belongs to each other" form of the plan makes you more passionate.
Vanessa Marin, an American sex therapist, says that drawing up a sex schedule is a way to show yourself and your partner that we value each other's sex lives, "just like we're carefully arranging all the important things in life, so why is sex excluded from you?" She also cautions that having this itinerary doesn't mean you'll never have sex again; Here are a few suggested ways to suggest it:
Think of him as a date, and i'm meeting you at some point today.
Imagine it's like you're arranging a big meal, going to an art gallery or a movie theater, you've added it to your itinerary, and you know that both sides will be free to spend time on each other, just for each other. Hey, isn't that romantic?
Before a date, you might even do something about it; the other person's favorite underwear, the one you'll start in bed, the bridge where each other likes... You can send a lovely text message to him flirting, you can spend a whole day fantasizing about it coming soon. These senses of expectation, all of which make sex time come before you feel happy.
In addition, you can plan different dating topics. For example, Wednesday is masturbation with each other, Saturday can be challenging toys. Such an arrangement would give you a positive freshness in the matter without realizing that you were going to "solve" what "problems" you were going to do.
It's like knowing each other's life preferences, just joining in the sex time.
When discussing sex schedules, you start thinking about each other's time, what other things to row out, and what each other wants to have intimate time at the time. You will have some adjustments and compromises as a result. But just as you've changed your eating habits for him since your relationship, he's started watching independent movies for you, and you're slowly taking into each other's life in your daily lives.
And now, you're just going to add sex to the discussion - if we have to agree to have sex at certain times, which frequency and time will you, he and i, particularly like? After such discussion, belonging to your sex itinerary, will be the most personal share. It's like tailoring it, you know it's for your life, for your relationship.
Here, it is also suggested that you can take turns to initiate "dates". Every time the person who takes the lead, try to ask your partner about the pattern synopsis he likes and the time he wants. When it's your turn, try to do your best to finish it. In these rotations, you will each feel that your desire is cared for and realized.
Photo : "Love Medicine DoesN's Medicine"
What if the time comes, but suddenly it's sexual?
Of course, it won't always be as perfect as you think. The most conceivable question is that people's desire is not a switch, say start on the start - if the agreed time is up, I am sexual all, how to do? Or do you want to ask, will sex schedules make people more stressed and then act worse?
Vanessa Marin suggests that you can give each other a "minimum requirement." For example, when the time comes, you are not in the mood, or are compressed by other emergencies, then you can agree to at least hug each other naked to sleep, for each other to do some of his favorite services (such as oral sex). It's important to have such an arrangement, because it makes you feel like you're not losing faith in each other. (Or try the great tongue-kissing technique:"More than doing the right thing, want to kiss well" Couples late at night: four tongue-kissing tips that keep you moving)
It also emphasizes the idea that the focus of the sex schedule is not really "agreed to have sex at what point in time." Instead of having sex, it's most about helping you maintain intimate links.
Making each other's sex schedules can actually be more natural and healthy than we thought. When you care about a person, you don't want to stay farther and farther away from each other, so keep intimate time in your life schedule like all other important things - if anything wants, then we'll work together. Meet each other and decide what it means to live together, isn't it here?