He was a loving father who had been involved in sexual assault. How do we remember Kobe Bryant, or, rather, which story we should choose to tell about him, is a very difficult but important question.

Kobe Bryant, who died on The 26th at the age of 41, crashed his private helicopter in the Los Angeles mountains, killing his 13-year-old second daughter, Gianna Bryant, in addition to Kobe. The crowd was shocked and mourned, and once we lost a legend, with a legend of the future.

Time magazine paid tribute to him in the form of a commemorative cover - a black-and-white photo of Kobe standing on stage, with his back to the camera, bowing his head, his right hand holding the basketball, wearing the Los Angeles Lakers' No.24 jersey with Bryant on his head. This is the last picture the world wants to remember.

And he left us a question, how do we remember him.

From the No.8 jersey to the No.24 jersey, he is a retired American basketball legend, covering almost all the professional basketball glory, known as the most influential player of this generation; he is the fan's mouth of the little flying man, black mamba and boss, enlightening many young basketball dreams, understand that there is a spirit called never give up; he is the father of four daughters, His children aspired to continue Kobe's basketball career, and when everyone told him you really should have a son, Kobe said his daughter was good enough.

And about him, we remember these things.

In 2003, he was charged with sexually assaulting a 19-year-old woman with a torn lower body, and he argued for a consensual public apology to the family, and finally reconciled with the Eagles, who officially retired in 2015. He has repeatedly spoken of the need for the WNBA to make it into the NBA, and in 2017 he won the 90th Academy Award for Best Animated Short Film for his animated short film Dear Basketball Dear Basketball.

How do we remember Kobe Bryant, or, rather, which story we should choose to tell about him?

This is a very difficult question.

It's not the disillusionment of myths, it's seeing the truth behind them.

Let's start with another story after Kobe Bryant's death.


Photo credit: Dazhi Images, AP Photo/Chris Pizzello

27, Washington Post reporter Felicia Sonmez sparked controversy when she tweeted a story about Kobe Bryant's alleged sexual assault, and Sonmez immediately deleted the post, received a threatening letter and chose to move temporarily, and was suspended by China Post. The editor-in-chief of The Washington Post said such an approach would hurt newspapers. 29 investigation, noting that Sonmez had not directly violated the newspaper's social media code and had been reinstated, stressed that he hoped journalists would not be punished for telling the truth.

And what would we see if we were to restore the Eagle County incident of 2003?

In 2003, Kobe Bryant was accused of sexually assaulting a 19-year-old woman and tearing her lower body while staying at a hot spring hotel in Colorado, according to foreign media.

At the time, Kobe stressed that the two were consensual and publicly apologized, saying he was sorry for his wife. The woman withdrew the case and settled out of court, when the woman was under great social pressure, and the defense lawyer defended Kobe on the grounds that the woman was still in the mood to have sex with others, citing the woman's sexual misconduct. In a public statement, Kobe said: "Although I firmly believe that both of us were consensual at the time, I now know that she felt differently from me, and in recent months her lawyer and her message told me that she was really feeling and that she did not agree with that." 」

At a time when the #Metoo movement, this incident has been repeatedly discussed, with the PTT version of the discussion using "kobe" as the synonym for "rape". There is disagreement between the two sides about this incident, and we have no way of understanding and restoring the truth, and this incident does have a concussion already for Both Kobe and the women involved. (Full event restore, read and understand:Kobe sexual assault controversy)

Pointing out a person's possible mistakes and discussing them is not the same as that he is the worst, dispelling all his achievements.

In cases of sexual assault, the concept of restored justice has been promoted in recent years, not only by law (traditional criminal justice, more similar to revenge justice), but also in the view of society and conflict to see criminal events. Advocates the establishment of "relationship justice" through problem detection, recovery of damage, and treatment of trauma, seeking the joint rehabilitation of perpetrators, survivors and the community. (Same Show: Interview with Eve Ensler: "Our society keeps telling survivors that you have to try to forgive, which is strange"

It is true that fans celebrate Kobe Bryant's brilliant achievements and miss the spirit that has been brought about by it because of the feeling that life has been closely linked to him, and that there is another group of people who think of the sexual assault allegations of that year, and the psychological pressure and weariness of the women at that time, linking to another heartbroken memory, It is true that idonist why this incident should not have been brought.


Pictured is a small fan hanging in kobe Bryant, pictured Source: Dazhi Images, AP Photo/Ringo H.W. Chiu

Work coexists, people are multi-faceted.

We want to say that a person can be both a legend and a rape. You don't have to accept his past mistakes unconditionally because you identify him as an idol. You can remember, but don't make a mistake, don't refuse to discuss it, or even choose to hurt, as Washington Post reporter Felicia Sonmez is in.

Tribute to Kobe Bryant, but not deified idol

Kobe has had sexual assault sin, and at the same time, there is no denying that he has contributed to the women's basketball.

Kobe has said publicly, "A lot of people have told me that you and your wife should have a boy to inherit your basketball pedigree." You should know, it's Gianna, this daughter is like me. 」


Pictured is Kobe with his daughter at the WNBA, Picture: Dazhi Images Supplied, Reuters

Because of his daughter, he was actively involved in the WNBA and college women's basketball team, and took Gianna to Connecticut several times to practice. WNBA star Briana Stewart mentioned that Kobe was one of the first people to contact her when she was injured, and Kobe said he would give her his full support and could ask him for help if he needed anything. After Kobe Bryant's death, she wrote, "We've lost the Bryant legend, but you can't help but think of the kids on the same helicopter, and of course Gianna, who has seen her play, who will say she's the father's successor." (Recommended reading: What about madness?) NIKE ad flip definition: "Tell them how crazy a woman is"

Retired woman Rebecca Lobo also tweeted, "No one has ever been as strong as he is in the WNBA." He watches the ball, he plays, he educates the next generation. Our thoughts are with his family. 」

What he inspires is a basketball culture in which everyone is involved, free, and capable of making a difference.

I love the Washington Post story, a reflection fromThe Storys we tell about Kobe Bryant.

"Should we retain the right of the victim to be heard and understood, even if the person he is acting is no longer alive, unable to defend ourselves?" In this way, whether we will be ashamed of their relatives and friends, whether we should leave them with a good reputation, let them remember that he is a loving father and husband. 」

This is a difficult question. It's also a very important issue of our time - let's remember Kobe Bryant, but not deifient the idol.

Let us invite idols to walk down the altar, let us restore their truth, I believe that the idol's weight lies in leading the people forward, not to be unconditionally tolerated wrong. I even believe that through discussion, through acceptance of that truth may also exist, which is never the destruction of myth, but to see the myth behind the existence of the truth, to give this person due to the three-dimensional and multi-faceted, is a respect and willing ness for him to understand.

We can be sure that his basketball spirit, for his basketball achievements, can also be because of his and his legal team in the handling of sexual assault incidents do not agree with and condemn.

How do we remember Kobe Bryant, which story should we choose to tell about him? Let us allow different voices, different memories, different stories, let us allow each other to choose their own way, tell his own story, remember this person.

And I believe that's the best way.


Photo credit: Dazhi Image sings, Reuters