Did you have a good talk about money before you got married? While this may not sound like a romantic thing, it is a more stable foundation that will help you go in the future. The sooner you talk, the better, start looking for ways now!
"From today on, whether it's good times or adversity, rich or poor, health or disease, I will always love you and cherish you." 」
At wedding ceremonies, we often hear this oath, stating that in the future life, we will strive to pay for each other's lives, regardless of the conditions. However, behind all these romances and courages, we also talk about the actual problem -- just as mature feelings are basic, you must also have a mature view of money if you want to live together.
The so-called maturity, no longer to prepare how much money is enough, but do you have a common understanding on money? If the money is so broad, have you started the discussion? Each of you may have different financial habits, how to coordinate together in the future?
Catherine Schnaubelt, a wealth strategist atForbes,says that discussing financial goals is something that partners have to go through, and that marriage often represents a merger of assets, and you need to start looking at money so that possible problems can be solved early. Here's what she suggests about the financial issues you should discuss at least before you get married:
Photo : Spring Nights
1. What is your money usage habit?
Just as everyone has their own hobbies and traits, catherine notes, it's also about saving and spending money. So you need to start to understand your partner's attitude to money, even going back to his native family, his parents' finances and habits, and so on; Once you can fully understand each other's money outlook and habits, these can help you build common financial goals.
2. What are your personal goals, and our common financial goals?
To live together, you will certainly have some imagination about the future. Like, do you all want to have your own house? What are your requirements for living? In what location, how big is the pattern enough? Once you've planned these blueprints, you can think about how to achieve your goals. One of these may be planning to have a shared account, or you may find that you actually have separate accounts that are actually better for you and so on.
3. Are you currently in any debt? If so, what would you do?
Finance is still a personal matter when you're single, but when you get married, it can be a lot more complicated. So you know what each other has, but you also know what the limitations are. Among them, you have to confirm if there is a debt problem. It could be student-financed tuition loans, household debt, or accumulated card debt from normal consumption. Trying to be honest with each other at this time and to know each other's credit scores and credit history is certainly important for your future financial planning.
How much property do you have? How do we distribute it after we get married?
Next, we'll talk about each other's possessions, and discuss ingresss together how they can be distributed after marriage, or what's next. And if you have plans to have some common assets after marriage, then if one day it will be separated, how will the financial distribution be distributed? These questions sound realistic, and there may be a bit of hurt. But believe me, the sooner you talk, the more good it will be for you.
Five, open the sharing of funds, together for the common goal of efforts!
Finally, Catherine suggests that after you and your partner have thoroughly discussed their financial history and habits, you can think about how to combine each other's finances to achieve common goals. Of course, you don't have to pull it out in the first place, which puts a lot of pressure on each other. Can you start with smaller projects, such as opening a joint checking account, to practice how to manage each other's shared funds.
Photo : Spring Nights
Discussing money with your partner may be a little strange to you. However, you can not become a financial expert at once, always need to through more than one repeated communication, spend a lot of time, to achieve a consensus to meet each other's needs. And in addition to the way of financial management, more important is actually also contains your mentality. Casey Slide, a columnist onMoney Clasherswho is also married and has children, has proposed several money-management ideas for newlyweds:
1. This one that needs to be "shared"
Money management in marriage doesn't mean you're quick to discuss it and get the perfect answer. It usually requires your long-term commitment and equal sharing of some responsibilities with each other. For example, you can both participate in decision-making, budgeting, and bill payments.
2. Don't forget to have love and be patient
Money-related things may sometimes upset you. But don't let yourself act rashly that could hurt the relationship. For example, when your partner is overspending, don't point to him yelling, but try to understand the reasons behind it, and tell him how it affects you, and how you, as a team, can improve together.
3. Try to trust each other, especially in terms of money
Unless you've determined today that your partner is systematically cheating on you, we should all practice trusting each other. For example, you should learn to give up control and not ask him how much he spent today and where he spent it, because when you don't trust him today, every move he does, you may look bad, or be suspicious or demeaning. Practice trust and you'll feel like you won't be under so much pressure on it.
4. Absolute honesty, which is important and fundamental
Honesty is always the best response. If you accidentally messuped it today, for example, you can't help but buy an item outside of your budget, try to be honest with your partner! You admit your mistake, he may be angry at first, but when he calms down, just see your sincerity and believe that you all have the ability to repair common goals. On the other hand, lying can have a huge impact, which can lead to irreversible relationships and financial holes.
5. Learn from each other and see where he deserves to be appreciated
Finally, as at any level you get along with, each other may have their own good, and so may be financially. He may be particularly good at investing, you may be careful and good at saving, and you'll try to learn from each other, appreciate each other's strengths, and make them a good tool for meeting your financial goals. In this process you will find that it is not just a financial matter, you are constantly increasing each other's emotional base and trust.
Everyone's financial goals are different from their own, and being a partner will also produce different financial plans and outcomes because of each other's tacit understanding. Chaimi oil salt, the more inseparable things, we have to have more understanding of it. Although the process may be a little hard, but because you want to live together, you are willing to work hard, which is what we believe in, the meaning of marriage.
As you later discovered, the more practical it is, the more romantic it is. Before we get married, honey, let's talk about money first!