In March 2020, an Apple Daily report indicated that some parents were dissatisfied with seeing female massage sticks in Baoya and even complained to the Consumer Protection Council. The Social Bureau issued a fine for violating the Children's And Young Law. What can be discussed in this news?

Is it true that women's rights are supported enough on March 9, 2020, the day after International Women's Day, when society is shouting about the importance of women's rights? Let's start with a news event that Apple Daily exclusively revealed.

According to the Apple Daily, a mother in Kaohsiung City recently took her son from her country of study to Go shopping in Baoya, and her son saw a female massage stick and asked her mother, "Mom, how do you use this?" " " Mother was embarrassed, and then complained to the Taiwan Consumer Protection Association, saying, "Why can the open store sit on sex products?" 」。

The Consumer Protection Council responded to the Kaohsiung City Social Bureau and sent inspectors to find that a total of 13 Baoya were publicly trafficked and imposed a fine on the grounds that Article 43, paragraph 3, of the Children's and Young People's Law, "No one may sell, deliver or supply substances or articles contrary to the physical and mental health of children and adolescents". As soon as the news broke, the massage bar brand Smile Makers also wrote that banning the sale of female massage sticks was "easily considered sexist."

There may be a few points to consider about this news.

First, the service of female sexual autonomy massage sticks, why is it harmful to physical and mental health goods?

Second, is it possible to limit the space for women's lust for autonomy in the ruling sedited by the current law?

Third, how can we imagine a better domestic sex education scene?

Is it strange that female massage sticks appear in beauty shops?

If condoms can be sold in beauty shops, why don't women massage sticks work? The mission is to "encourage women to be brave enough to explore themselves and promote social health to treat women's sexual pleasures" female massage bar brand Smile Makers, who, believing that sex is a part of human health and nature, refuses to sell it in adult stores, including mainstream beauty, pharmaceutical and department stores since the brand was founded. It is the desire to convey the notion that "sex is healthy, not pornographic or obscene".

However, it is clear that this concept is not recognized by the Kaohsiung City Social Bureau, and even imposed penalties. Brand manager Ariel Chen also responded to the incident in a February 20 post on the Smile Makers Facebook fan page, writing:

The practice of offering condoms that prohibit the sale of vibrators/massage sticks ignores the needs of many women--- including "women without a partner" or "women who cannot achieve orgasm through sexual intercourse" and "users who believe that vibrators/massage sticks lead to a better sexual experience (including their own use or with their partner)." In fact, banning the sale of vibrators/massage sticks outside adult service stores may lead to more women having casual sex with their unfamiliar partners, which can lead to an increased risk of unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases.

Finally, it is easy to be considered sexist to recognize that men have a need for safe orgasms, but ignore the needs of most women who cannot orgasm through sexual intercourse.

Under the influence of patriarchal thought, women's lust is often neglected by society. Writer Winsdale. Martin has written "Sex, Lies, And Birkin Bags" about women's lust. Interviews with university professors, biologists, and sociologists discuss the "correlation between social culture and female sexuality". Winsdale. Martin mentions:

Harvey. Weinstein, Matt. Raul, Charlie. Ross, such men, in the social ecology they show us, women are vases, men play things, they use such power to take away women's power, men dominate the fate of women. At the same time, men who don't respect, or think that women don't agree with each other is a small thing, project a worldview that obtaining women's consent is unnecessary and a barrier to trouble. In this state of mind, female desire is nothing more than a boost, and the real focus is on what men want. What these men do deprives women of sexual autonomy.

From men's attitudes towards women, from mother's education to mother's education to society's expectations of women, and even from the case of government fines for beauty shops, we see that women's desires are not taken seriously and are always expected to be "suppressed". As a woman, if you want to talk about sex in public, you may be branded "disrespectful" and "disrespectful".


Diagram. Photo: Paora Facebook

As long as parents feel unsuitable for their children, should they be eliminated in one fell swoop?

In addition to the neglect of female sexual desire needs, parents' attitudes towards sex are also extremely important. In the Baoya case, the mother complained to the Consumer Protection Council because she did not know how to explain the sex products to her child. It's a mentality of "not knowing how to explain/ don't want to explain, but blaming the other person for "how do you ask me" or "how can you sell".

This is not a single parent case, nor is it just a contemporary society. Many people have experiences in childhood when parents say, "You'll know when you grow up / Don't ask so much for children." As long as parents think it is inappropriate for children's knowledge/learning, then nothing is mentioned. In this way, not only will the child's doubts not be answered, but parents themselves may also lose the opportunity to explore more possibilities.

If we can keep an open mind and respond positively to the problem with a frank attitude, perhaps both parents and children can have more growth. When asked by a child, he studies together;

You don't need to be the perfect parent to ask a hundred questions, you just need to be a dedicated parent who can respond positively to your child's needs.

And, through the upbringing process, parents also have the opportunity to make up for their childhood lack of that sex education.

In the past, women fans have talked about sex education with children: Taiwanese parents, you don't have to be so war-torn, mentioned in the article:

Many extremely conservative or special factors of the family, "sex/ not" instead is deliberately avoid "not taught" or deliberately "taught to be a certain look", as if not to know, touch and buy condoms will not "encourage" sexual behavior, but really when sex is not aware of security measures, so increase the risk of pregnancy and disease, Or, women to wear skirts to sit together, to legs together, otherwise they will be sexually harassed, to protect themselves from being violated is the responsibility of women, chastity is only to keep is a clean virtue, otherwise sexual assault is their own dirty not to obey the woman, will be "sex / not" to shame, demonization, sin deterioration, purity, sacred or imprisoned.

Avoid sex, will be sexual stigma, in addition to the child will miss the process of understanding their own, the child may not know how to face their own lust, do not know how to open up about the discussion. Further, there may be problems such as the possible identification, identification of sexual harassment, sexual violence and so on. Treating lust as "a matter that doesn't work on the table" will only expose children to more danger.

If you don't want your child to be an adult, you don't know anything about sex, you don't know how to use a condom, you don't know how to use a massage stick to deal with your sexuality. Now and sex education to face off.