Interview with Thai Spicy, go home. How hard is it to get out of the house with your parents? When the child out of the cabinet, how to adapt to their "sudden" become a gay parents? This episode, let's have a chat with Thai Spicy with his father.
On the set:"The World, It's So Horrible" Interview with Thai Spicy: When I Lie Alone on the toilet floor, I realize how bloody bullying is
Next episode:"Good Love, Can Take You Away" Interview with Tai Spicy: My Life To Be Queen, Not Whose Wife, But Myself
Probably a lot of comrades out of the cabinet experience, are very sudden and at a loss.
Sophomore and third, Tai Spicy was accidentally found by his parents to be gay. A phone call from Nantou's hometown immediately brought The Spicy Call home. Sitting on the passenger, Tai Spicy realized that he had only been there for more than two hours, and could think of what he was going to do, but his head was blank.
Looking out of the window, the degree of urgency is faster than driving. Even if he knew in my heart that there would be this day, it caught him off guard.
Say what? How do you say that? The secret of 20 years in your heart, which only gives you 2 hours to prepare a set of words, seems a bit cruel.
"I decided to tell the truth, and when they accused me, I talked about being bullied in our high school. Tai Spicy claims that it is emotional blackmail, sound negative, but also reflects the comrades to their parents out of the cabinet of the hardships.
"Where are my parents when their children need parental protection?" I am a fall, on their own to climb up the person; What are your responsibilities as parents? 」
The air in the living room condenses, it's the moment of the family revolution, a couple of parents, a gay child. Thai spicy in the past twenty years of the voice of the public, but the family can not catch him for a moment and a half.
"Think about it, I'm really vicious, and my parents should have really hurt me. Thai spicy down the eyelids, I did not ask him after not regret. This family dialogue, estimated that no one did anything wrong, no one can blame anyone.
"My dad spent ten years accepting the subject of being gay" gay parents.
Perhaps not every scene out of the cabinet, are so sabre-rattling, but it is certain that every time out of the cabinet, there is its difficulty.
Dad: "You look like this, All my life efforts in vain." 」
Then my father drove away and didn't go home for two days. And the father dropped that sentence, let Thai spicy impressed, remember so far.
The process of reconciliation is long and painful.
Hurt each other but also hurt each other. In fact, whether gay or straight, family members often do.
On one occasion, the father reflected on what he had done wrong and why he had been born to such a child. Tai Spicy is very direct when said: "You are wrong, you are a very self-centered, very chauvinistic." You look at society as a whole with your patriarchal thinking, so I'm the subject you have to face. 」
Thai spicy to anyone is a straight ball duel, even the family is no exception, so often and father of a head-on conflict.
A big masculine, a comrade, two people in extreme positions, are likely to go from road to a break. But fortunately, the father and son did not ever interact.
Dad's mouth does not say, in fact, bit by bit for the Thai spicy change.
From his 20-year-old exit to his 30-year marriage, dad spent 10 years practicing how to be a gay father and adapt to a new identity, "and to this day, he's still learning." 」
"I think he has a review of himself after every conflict. "Thai chided his head, recalling his past confrontation with his father, "Although he did not see the review process, but every time it happened, he seemed to understand the difference more and more, but also more and more able to put down prejudice." Now he has become a soft man. 」
"What moved me the most was that my dad spent ten years changing himself. 」
On the wedding day, Dad boasted of being beautiful for the first time.
When an originally homophobic father, into the wedding of a gay son, for each other, have a very profound significance.
Remember when my father showed up, it was a little awkward and uncomfortable, refused to lead Thai hot into the field, also do not want to speak, just want to stay quiet. That scene, much like the epitome of these years - far and near, there is something to say but no way to open, the heart has love but do not know how to express.
Father and son, you and I, blood is the inevitable existence of each other's connection, there are similarities, there are water and fire can not be allowed. In this life, we have been practicing coexistence, learning to communicate, slowly polishing the relationship between the two people.
When Thai spicy wearing a wedding dress, slowly walked past his father's side, the father suddenly can not help but feel the mood, no warning will hold him, pat him on the shoulder, instantly let Thai spicy tears more than. Embrace is the warmest body language, you feel the other person's temperature at the same time, found that the original themselves are giving.
"I remember that light was on that side of it. "Thai hot refers to the light in front of the light, laughing that it for him to witness the whole process.
At that time, my father gently in the thai hot ear, squeezed out a sentence: "You are very beautiful." 」
Photo by Ty La
Long so big, Thai spicy only saw his father shed three tears, one of which was at his wedding. And this is the first time that dad used the words "beautiful" to praise Thai spicy.
At the wedding, Dad saw the most authentic Thai for the first time.
Don't know father saw Thai spicy wearing a wedding dress, the mood of why, but this brewing for several years of hugging, has explained everything. Xu has comfort, Xu has heartache, or moved for it, depressed but light, from the eyes.
I love you, I am willing to practice for you, how to be a gay father, your father.
Dad's actions and encouragement to make the whole wedding more complete. Tai Spicy understands that his father has been able to love the real him.
"Dad, thank you, I love you, I want to thank you even more for loving a complete me. 」
you're a native family, but you can care about it
Thai spicy body, there are three tattoos.
The first tattoo, designed by Thai Spicy himself, was tattooed on the right arm. It looks like chemistry, with the initials of the parents and sister-in-law, and an outward-extended space that will be left to future people who will appear in life.
"Actually, that person is a husband, but I know it's good." Thai spicy pointed to the blank. This interpretation is very moving, some love does not have to be engraved, just in the heart.
Keep your family on your skin, and Ithasnity hasn't hesitated for long.
Many of the pain that is difficult to deal with comes from the native family; Our feelings to the family, many times is love and hate, because this is impossible to cut the blood connected, can not wave goodbye to each other's life.
"Well, these names are my family, and they won't change. 」
Tai spicy can now smile and talk, the pain as a cloud of smoke, in fact, with the family through a dialogue and recovery of the road.
"When I was a kid, I hated my dad. And ten years time is enough for an otherwise homophobic father to begin to praise the beauty of his gay son, "Children, don't be underestimating the power of their parents." 」
The other two tattoos are the Thai-bred cat, the nobleman, and a former goldfish.
It's funny, all three tattoos are life. I was thinking, it seems that because these life pulseand and love, enough to make Thai spicy good life.
Our home: there is you by your side, why
Today, in addition to reconciliation with the native family, Tai Spicy also formed a new family. After nearly five years of dating with his husband, he finally entered the auditorium.
Thai spicy is YouTuber and KOL, not afraid of not shy, like to try many different things;
Two people have very different personalities, but each other suck, who did not expect, the original only in the dating software to know the two sides, and finally become the other half of each other's life. Husband accompanied Thai spicy up the mountain, try to meet the Thai spicy want to do;
He and his husband have three cats together: the white cat, the orange cat Poka, the black and white cat such as the one. Watching Tai Spicy feed the cat in the kitchen with her husband, or lovingly holding the cat in your arms, you can see how much he cares about the new family.
Their love, three meals a day, two people four seasons, very simple and very practical.
Although the world is not perfect, society is not very kind, but you have love in your heart, you know how to survive.
This is what Thai Spicy didn't say, but taught us.