"So will be responsible for the birth ah" from the girl domestic violence case to the coast guard post: where is the vanishing father to go?

Recently, we have been concerned about two child-rearing-related current events, one of which is the issue of the responsibility of the Coast Guard to take care of children during the Dragon Boat Break and the gender discussion of the case of child abuse in Tainan during the same period.

According to the Central News Agency , a 4-year-old girl in Tainan suffered serious injuries from hot water burns to her feet on June 28 , 2020 and delayed medical treatment . After the incident was uploaded to the community website by netizens, the Tainan City Social Bureau also received a report to investigate.

According to the family, two weeks ago the girl's stepfather tried to discipline her for throwing things and bad reasons, and splashed her children with hot water; In this regard, the media seems to catch the mother's job omission handle, as a sensational news headline, the responsibility of the mother suddenly put on the body.

Some people say, where did Dad go? Or we want to talk more about whether a better support environment is extinguished when a family goes wrong and society as a whole goes from speech to focus?

Father shlawed behind '22-year-old young mother's marriage 3 times, 4 children different dads' media undergoes

Sanli News article entitled "Tainan girl abused feet rot!" The 22-year-old young mother has been married three times, four children of different fathers report stressed that "22-year-old Lin surnamed biological mother has three marriages, symbiotic children, (this abuse) girl is born with the first ex-husband", and this is an "exaggeration."

The report went on to mention that the stepfather, surnamed Ye, "has hit the child several times, at first the mother will speak out to persuade, but to the back also began to hit the child, and even revealed that Ye male will also start hitting the baby boy as young as 2 or 3 months old." 」

Beneath these veins can be seen that both the father and mother in the family were mis-followingchildren, but the Sanli News editor went on to say on Facebook, "So have children... That birth is responsible for ah" text, all of a sudden the blame on the mother, pointed to her marriage many times, disordered relationship is the main reason for the later incidents.

In this post, netizens followed the group, accusing the mother should tie up, take off the uterus, sew the hole up, and some people scolded her as ""," """""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""" Words such as "young", "married and divorced" and "half-brother" touch the reader's sensitive nerves, evoke the sacred demands of society for maternal duties, and the belief that the father's duties disappear into the family is not strange.

Here, even as journalists report on the events in full, the reader's focus has been on the young mother, and few are again focusing on the whole problem behind child abuse. (Extended Reading: Will you hit you because you love you? Seven Questions and Answers to the Domestic Violence Protection Order )

"When the child is quiet, something bad can happen" the coast guard advertises child care, but doesn't see the father

The day before the news (June 27), the coast guard issued a Facebook post saying that "when children are quiet, something bad may have happened" and called on parents to ignore sliding their phones while ignoring their children's status.

However, in the first image posted by the Coast Guard, only one mother is seen, suggesting that child care is the responsibility of a woman. Posting out, immediately caused netizens to discuss the gender stereotypes, and some people mentioned that since the sex to talk about, then why can't the long-haired women in the picture be fathers? Are you yourself stereotyped and not self-aware?

Photo- and Facebook

Zhu Jia'an , a social commentator , said that the reason why this stereotype is bad is not because all the stereotypes are bad , but because this stereotype leaves the responsibility for care to women . This in itself is unfair, and it is easy for society to blame only mothers in the time of the accident, not to think about what society can do for these small families. And when someone wants to argue, "How do you know that the person in the picture is a woman?" also blurs the focus of the discussion.

He believes that the stereotype that the ultimate child care is the mother's responsibility will make women worse off, and also make society because it can always be attributed to women, and it is not easy to offer help in the care of children related matters. 」

The coast guard eventually changed the picture in response to the public's reaction, leaving his father present. However, the continuation of Zhu Jia'an put forward the point, in fact, today's main caregiver is the father is also good, mother also, or parents work together, and finally we have to return to how can really maintain a whole family issue. Read: Men have babies, can be very warm: we can do more for the baby when it comes to waiting for the mother to come back and pretend not to be able to do more)

Photo- and Facebook

Gender stereotypes then? The most important thing is that we haven't found a better care environment

So, go home to the discussion of functionality; first we see from these two news that the gender stereotypes in society are still there, and some people take their own positions, then what?

In these cases we assume that he is a heterosexual two-parent family, where dad is at home, but is not present when he needs it, or that he does not perform his due functions; In this respect, we do need to discuss the orientation and importance of gender stereotypes.

However, we also need to see that many families may not be monogamous combination, there may be single parents, intergenerational upbringing, sometimes the function of father, mother, but also because of different family status and stage and difference. If these two pieces of current affairs, are talking about neglect of care after the harm to children, so here we are not only talking about not to stop deification of the mother, father want to go home, but no matter what my family combination, my home is not a place to feel at ease to let the child grow up?

Blame the mother for not really helping the injured family, just to talk about dad should go home.

What we need more, in the end, is that the caregivers of a family can work harder to sustain each other with the support of the whole society as an open and friendly one. On the way home, mom, father, or children can all feel down-to-earth and happy. (Recommended reading: Mom is not a family nanny!) Swedish Parenting: Parenthood is a good job)