"The body is your own, if you don't even like it, how happy?" For a long time, the female horse dancer Yu Ling hated her body. Looking at her muscular body lines and standing with the slender girls, she is always the object of choice. In the face of cruel criticism from the world, how did she clean up her broken heart through her performance and begin to learn to accept her imperfect self?
On the dim stage, six dancers showed the unique strength of the women's circus in an extreme manner.
They faded their clothes, only naked underwear, in a slow but full of strength pace to climb to each other's bodies, the girl's curves because of the show of muscle strength and more clear, muscle-shaped lines, imperfect inch body appearance, all show.
The music in the venue came to a halt, surrounded by the sound of the audience and the dancers breathing in different depths, the dancers' movements continued, the girl lifted the girls to her waist, trampled on each other's bodies, and finally presented the perfect end pose. The audience could see God, and some even shed tears.
This is the opening performance of the 4th Global Women's Impact Forum, where young dancers from all fields of performing arts create a focal point (Eye Catch Circus)'s women's circus brings a wonderful bridge segment of the "Since 1994" dance code.
"Female stunt dancers are more likely to be picked out" social vision, so that we hate their bodies
"I care about other people's eyes and I'm very dissatisfied with my figure, " Said Mei Yuling, director of "Ever 1994" and a stunt dancer, speaking of her post-social experience.
The figure of female dancers is easily compared by the owners, and because stunt dancers have more commonly developed muscle curves and skeletons, they are more likely to be picked and picked when choosing corners, mr. Yu said.
"There was a time when I really wanted to be what everyone looked like, so I tried a lot. She said that during that time because of a variety of unhealthy weight loss, dieting, so that their physical and mental pressure.
With The Same Window For More Than Ten Years, The Same Female Horse Dancer Blue Yuyun (Little Blue) On The Side To Add That, In College, They Realized That Many Female Stunt DancerS After The Age Of 18 To Give Up Professional, There Is A Big Reason For The Community'S Vision And RestrictionS On Women'S BodieS.
"All along, we feel that the "good-looking" body is still mainly slim, but we train very strong every day, spend at least four hours a day training muscle endurance, so compared with girls of the same age, girls doing stunts will certainly look strong, very big only. This causes many girls to leave the circle after puberty in order to want to wear good-looking clothes, in order to want to be praised for being thin and beautiful. 」
What little is known is that the beauty of stunts lies in the display of physical strength and the beauty of transcending various endurance limits and presenting visual effects that break through the past. This physical state is far from the "beauty, beauty" that is commonly used to, and is more likely to be the biggest obstacle for female stunt dancers when they go out to pick up cases. Speaking of the experience of past cases, Yu Ling can still feel the bitterness of being compared and picky.
We will have some stereotypes, will feel that girls are thin, or limited strength. But stunts can break the frame in ability.
"The body is your own, if you don't even like yourself, how happy?" 」
"After leaving school, I found that many festivals and large-scale performances were dominated by men, and the Circus circle in Taiwan was relatively small, but strangely, the vast majority of well-known artists and famous performers were also male-dominated. The difficult situation became the beginning of Yu Ling's "Since 1994" play, and when she spoke of the past, her eyes were still filled with confusion and helplessness about the rules of the industry.
Recalling her pre-university life, she said: "Traditional art school is an eight-year system, from small boys and girls to practice stunts together, grow up together, a bit like Shaolin Temple feeling," she laughs, practicing stunts, traditional drama students gender ratio is very different, when a class of 16 people, girls accounted for eleven positions, but after graduation to engage in creative or art-related work are men.
Therefore, from the beginning of the university, the idea of organizing a "women's circus" began to emerge. It is hoped that an open platform can be created for female dancers to bring together a group of talented and promising girls.
"Female stunt dancers have more developed lines and more power, so even if the dancers are just standing on the stage, there can be a kind of "what is being said" atmosphere and force, " Xiao Blue shared, but in recent years because bodybuilding began to prevail, more people realize that the original "beauty" has more different forms, can be said to be unexpectedly keep up with the popularity.
Taking advantage of the rise of the word female power, Xiaolan and Yuling also feel the change of social atmosphere in particular, so they would like to highlight the "strength" of girls in the performance process, the past school does not allow girls to develop projects, such as upside down, into the performance.
"When these power movements are shown by girls, they are more likely to show the so-called "feminine power", because circus performances limit a lot of posture and posture, " she said, adding that she hopes the audience watching the show will feel that women can not only be gentle, but also powerful and strong.
"The word women's circus, want to give female stunt dancers confidence, tell everyone: if you dare not say, can now be brave to say it. The body is your own, and if you don't even like it, you won't be happy to do anything. 」
The common belief between Xiaolan and Yu Ling is to pass this energy on to the descendants of more traditional art schools, so that more people know that even though we and society still have many requirements for external evaluation and body shape, we can still bravely stand up and understand and learn how to like ourselves more.
Never make-up dare not go out, to accept their own: overcome the "over the sky" performance, bravely present imperfect
"I am a start from college, even in the early eight, I must make up to go out, " Yan Ling admitted, from the makeup this matter began to stretch out the "Since 1994" creation of the core concept, for her, go out is to force themselves to face the outside world, must put their own dress up, face the day's battle.
"But in fact, a lot of girls should feel the same way, make-up is actually quite tired, " she laughs, one day she dragged her exhausted body home, began to remove makeup, remove clothes and tightly tied to her body's coat and underwear, she suddenly felt comfortable, "I found really comfortable at home, back home at that moment, I feel free, this kind of comfort and you dress up to sit in the coffee shop." 」
From that moment on, she thought about why she kept wearing makeup and why she was tied up in lingerie.
"In fact, at home is a person's most real appearance, " from the life of small things extended, Yu Ling put such an idea figuratively rendered on the stage, but also to the girl's room on the stage, on the stage back to a dress, return to the naked and real bridge section.
But even dancers accustomed to performing in front of the public are very difficult to present their naked bodies, and during rehearsals, the six dancers endure quite a lot of inner suffering and swinging.
"It's very difficult for us, and we even talked about, "Is it necessary to do this?" XiaoLan admitted that in the rehearsal stage, many dancers also have the idea of "don't do it for the sake of doing, don't force yourself", in the process of thinking about pulling, the dancer is also a step closer to thinking about their relationship with the body.
"I could hardly face it at first, and I couldn't even see myself naked at home. During the rehearsal process, I told myself every day: I am very good, since I want to create, I have to take the first step. 'Every rehearsal is actually a confidence-building process, and if the creation is to open up to the audience and meet in good faith, then the performer must first convince himself, ' he said honestly.
"After all, if I don't accept myself, how can I convince the audience to practice falling in love with my body and how to move them?" 」
"When we stepped down naked to face the audience, they all cried. 」
"Being a women's circus is actually a healing thing for me. I put a lot of my own stories and experiences on stage, because a lot of girls have the same problems during puberty, so the show is more likely to resonate. 」
The female horse "Since 1994" has a bridge section, all the dancers back to layers of clothes, wearing flesh-colored underwear, they will draw on each other symbol criticism, restraint and frame of the red line, and then the dancers will slowly walk off the stage, close to the audience, the most naked self in front of the audience.
They will pass through each pair of eyes, sometimes sitting, sometimes quietly staring, and sometimes pick up the audience's hand in their own body to add another smudge of red lines, each eye and contact, are full of peeping at each other. At that time, the ring will only stand on the stage, watching the peeping is happening.
"We were really close to the audience at the time, and someone was crying in front of me, " Little Blue shared, and from last year (2019) to now, the feelings of each show audience have changed, to the fourth, she has been able to gradually feel the warmth in the crowd.
"Recently, when I walked down, I was not afraid, but I was like walking into the crowd and giving them a good look at me, " he said, walking into the crowd, much like being gently covered in layers of clouds.
The bridge segment was meant to recreate the peeping eyes given by the public as the girls walked down the road.
"Usually when we see girls who are less dressed or good-looking on the road, we can't help but look more than two times, but in the theater, when we really walk up to you, some of the audience will avoid the eyes, I think it's a very interesting place, " Yu Ling shared, each dancer shuttled through the audience felt different energy, depending on the experience of individual life, perhaps some people feel the warmth of being covered by the crowd, but also some people feel the fear or grievance of being peeped.
And for this play choreographer, even if she just stood on the stage, did nothing, she always in this section of the bridge crying.
"I stood on stage and watched everything happen, and I cried so much in all four performances that I couldn't control myself, tears and snot out of control, " said Yu Ling, who knew she was releasing years of emotion, feeling the hard work of the past and being tied to herself by the frame.
Telling your own story is the hardest because you have to pick up your wounds, or even show them to others. However, after the pickpocketing, it is the bath fire reborn.
Standing on the stage at that moment, watching the girls step down one by one, every stranger walking through the breathless look of shock, it is as if the past peeping and peeping scene spread out, exposed to the sun, Yuling felt their wounds are bleeding, but flowing, the body is surrounded by a warmth, she realized that the straight ball face of the process, but also in healing scars.
"Even though I was just standing there, it was the most tired, the most tired bridge for me, but every moment I passed, I felt healed, I knew myself better, and it felt like, "I've shown you, I've seen it." 」
For Yu Ling, this work is a gift to himself, take aside the regret and uncomfortable memory of life, growth will continue, to the distant road, can continue to walk with imperfections.
The last syllable of the dance music fell, the performance ended, the audience will also be their own doubts left in the theater, gently get up, pick up the energy obtained in the performance, in the moment out of the theater, regardless of gender, we are all from the frame of the cocoon broke out, wearing a unique wing, can fly wings.