In an exclusive interview with Zheng Yinon, we talked about the relationship between "writing self" and "knowing oneself", Andinon said that there is no shortcut to knowing oneself, it is the accumulation of life day by day.
Women fans from singer Zheng Yinon, visit writer Zheng Yinon, watching her come and go between roles, with a way to complete their lives across the "definition", with "Zheng Yinon" three words to replace a variety of roles, her appearance, can have a variety of shapes and states, she does not have to be musician Zheng Yinon, does not have to be actor Zheng Yinon, also does not have to be the writer Zheng Yinon, her existence itself represents all.
Talking to Inon, a ray of light fell through the drizzle and landed right on her face, just as the photographer captured a moment of light and shadow on her body.
From the beginning of writing yourself to talking about how to learn more about yourself, Inon says, there is nothing particularly "step-by-step" that will take you further afield as time goes on.
When it comes to relationships, Yiannon blurts out to live to this age, and the next second laughs and laughs at himself not to rely on the old to sell old. She mentions that her current relationships have become more balanced, and finding comfortable but responsive patterns between them is not too sticky, too alienated, and is just a good distance.
When we rely on all kinds of relationships, people will only become more and more vulnerable
We talk about being alone and why is it so important to keep your own time? Loneliness needs to be practiced, Says Ynon.
"When I was a kid, I lived in a very quiet environment, and I used to say that the sound in peace is the greatest, because when you're in a quiet state, you give yourself a lot of time to come back to the original state to face the world, because you have to judge your relationship with the world, and all the sounds start to become important. 」
In the letter era, or even earlier, we do not know how big the world is, people have many ways to feel the world, can use their own way to survive, to find answers, to extend their own shape, but with the network, we lost such space and time, all the time in the state of information explosion shed, we will feel more lonely and consumed.
Loneliness and consumption, in fact, have their own, Said Ernon, because we are too used to filling up space, so lack of time to digest things.
Like, we are very often used to looking for friends to cry when we fall out of love, mobile phone address book head, one by one are our tree holes. Button out, you can pour out emotions, unruly spit out anger and disappointment, tell people are not eager to recycle something, the mood throw out, as if someone catch, do not have to face their own difficulties.
"When we rely on all kinds of relationships, people will only become more and more vulnerable, " Yi Nong touched his nose, said that in the process of growing up, there is indeed a time may not be able to face loneliness and confusion, but the old saying, time will take you away.
"At my stage, the relationship around me gradually developed a healthy pattern, we can have their own time to deal with their own things, do not have to report everything to each other, what situation rest assured that he digested, do not intervene, if there is a real need, he will open his mouth to you." 」
To want a healthy relationship, in addition to relying on the progress of time, the grind of the years, sometimes you need more determination.
All loneliness and grievance, in fact, are their own choice
Deal with quiet, but also deal with loneliness.
For Yi Nong, loneliness is a more physical state than loneliness, "You go to lunch alone today, you look lonely, but loneliness is a spiritual thing, when you are surrounded by people, but feel lonely, that is a very essential problem, then you will not feel good lonely, good lonely, you will feel good lonely." Therefore, we do not need to discuss how to "overcome" loneliness, because loneliness is the essence, you have no way to solve it, it must exist.
"People are born a person to come, die when a person walks, we finally face old and sick, that is a very painful process, this whole thing is full of loneliness, since we all know it will be, then whether to think of "people live is very painful", or to think "such loneliness is actually very good"?" 」
Since loneliness can't be solved, it can only be hard scalp straight ball duel. There is a lot of loneliness in life that is formed in your unconscious choices, from "unconscious" to "conscious" to relying on awareness and practice, and Inon's eyes flash, referring to the "responsible" exercises she is doing recently.
What is a responsible exercise? 'We Pisces are innocent bodies,' she said with a laugh. In the face of what happened to me, there is always a sense of absurdity of "I don't know why this is happening". As a bottom-up Pisces, she spent a very long life exploring "why this is happening." Inon is like the practice of putting philosophy into life, carefully analyzing themselves, why on earth is this?
"For example, I'm a very disadvantaged person, and I start to wonder, "Ah, do I really want to buy this?" "At times like this, I usually cause myself, the clerks and the people in the back line very much trouble, " the so-called "responsible" exercise, that is, whenever such a moment, she must tell herself: to change, the next time you have to force yourself to check out, or you will decisively walk away, since you are already standing here, you have to take responsibility for standing here, do not go into a dilemma, do not know what to do.
She explained: "When I'm faced with a relationship, an excessive sentence, I choose to swallow it or speak it out, and when I'm threatened, I choose to fight back or hold back." If I choose to swallow, then I am not qualified to complain, however, today if I choose to fight back, all the possible consequences of fighting back, I have to bear their own. 」
Any choice is bound to cost something. Therefore, in the face of the loneliness brought about by the "unconscionable group", Yi Nong sincerely share, she now understands that all the disassolic groups are their own choice, in this case, all loneliness and grievance, are also their own choice.
Gender is the concept of society, become the real self, it does not have to be a matter for you
Never in groups, talking about not being able to find his own positioning and sense of belonging in the gender spectrum, Inon daggered and said cautiously, "I recently studied a man, Harry Style of One Direction, who loved to wear women's clothes, who would dress himself up beautifully, and whenever the media came to this point, he would answer confidently that gender was an abstract concept to me." 」
Inon throws out his thoughts: "Why can Harry Style think so?" Because he's a very confident person, he thinks I just want to wear it because I think it looks good. 」
Think about the problem, if you return to the essence, find that the crux is not in gender, but whether you have confidence, like or not now their own?
As a creator facing the times, Yinon in her own way in understanding the world, trying to through the creation of dialogue with it, through words, voices, performances to undertake the body full of thoughts, she felt that even if it is not the best era, but it is indeed a good era in some things, standing on this basis, we have more space, carriers and ways to express themselves, more can produce collisions, more can fight, but also can fight for their rights.
"I think the children of the future, at least in the "who they are" thing will be less and less fear, they may be afraid of other things, but they will certainly be easier to know themselves, because there is room to keep saying who I am, to be able to say in the process of bumping into the real self, or the most favorite look." 」
To ask her, She says, she encourages people to embrace the times and find their own self-confidence, and gender is a social concept, but it doesn't have to be a matter for you on the way to being who you really are.
Post-interview notes
I wouldn't say I'm a fan of Ionon, but I like her creations and talk, as I said at the very beginning. Just like her style, let us in the music, but can feel the great quiet, light singing sad songs.
"Lonely Petri dish" this book, small open book, word-level leading is particularly exquisite, the page below the book has a large white. This white, like the breath of words, heavy words to gently say, Yi Nong wrote a book, but also for everyone set up a grandstand, opened the distance, with space, the field of vision can be more clear.
When chatting, Yiannon often laughs and uses "I think it's funny" as a starting point, and then expresses himself in detail.
We talked about why she was so attached to romantic things, she laughed and said, often feel that she is an existential king, the universe is so vast, outside the solar system, there are infinite areas we do not understand, so we are in the universe, is the existence of super nanoscale, today's events, bus ride, by the driver, very unhappy, for the whole universe may not matter at all.
"On the premise that what I'm wearing today, how much money I'm spending, what kind of house I live in, whether I'm a successful person, what others think of you, it's probably not that important to the universe as a whole." 」
So what's important? 'Whether you're successful or not, when you're lying in a hospital bed today and you're seriously ill, and the nurse comes over to help you wipe your back, change your clothes, change your medicine, do something,' she continued, 'you can smile at him, and for Yiannon, that's romance.'
"You ask me why romance is so important, because romance is meaning. 」
At the end of my interview with Yinon, my heart is full of energy, very glad that in this era, this present, met her at this moment.
So I made up my mind that from tomorrow on, I would be a romantic.