Jayda Smith shaved his head due to hair loss, and at the 94th Oscars, he was jokingly hurt by the host Chris Rock, and then Will Smith stepped up to the stage and slapped Locke. Words hurt people, violence hurts people, as well as the lack of diversity and integration of the film and television industry DEI, and the limitations of male characters, after a slap, set off a huge wave of community discussion.

On Monday morning, Taiwan time, the 94th Oscars grandly unfolded, on the Oscars stage, the host Chris Rock (Chris Rock) with a "joke", sprinkled salt on The wound of Jayda Smith, followed by a heavy slap on The kris Rock. The person who shot it was this year's Oscar winner Will Smith. The audience on and off the stage was stunned.

What the hell is going on?

Photo| Tatsushi Images/Associated Press

Is sprinkling salt on someone else's wound a joke or a verbal injury?

During the Oscars, the host Chris Rock first said "Jayda I love you", and then joked about the bald head of Jaida Smith (who is also Will Smith's wife). Jadal Smith, who has suffered from hair loss for many years, has talked about her fear of hair loss in public interviews, and last year, she decided to shave all her hair.

Jada once said in an interview that she washed her hair in the bathroom, holding a large bundle of hair that had fallen off her scalp, which made her very frightened, "I stood in the shower, holding my hands full of hair, thinking' Oh my God, am I going to become bald?'" It was one of the few moments in my life when my whole body trembled with fear."

She has admitted in several interviews that hair loss is something she can't talk about, and that grooming her hair was once her daily ritual. She still chose to talk about this matter frankly in the interview, so that the struggle of women with hair loss can be seen.

In December 2021, she publicly tried to face the hair loss disorder with a more self-empowering mindset, she showed off her bald head on IG, and some of the traces of the hair loss disease on her scalp, she said:

"See this line?" Now, it's getting harder and harder for me to cover up, so I want to share it with you and save you from asking the same question. ⋯⋯ Next I will fully display my head, so no one will ask me if I have brain surgery or anything else 😜, and I am about to become friends with hair loss... 😆」

Jada is trying new ways, in the face of her appearance changes, she is still groping for a relationship with the friend of "hair loss", she hopes to put an end to the discussion, does not mean that she is ready to accept such jokes.

If you know it's someone else's wound, if you're not sure if the wound has healed, don't put salt on the wound. In fact, the only person who knows whether the wound has healed is himself.

(Extended reading: Love doesn't take the effort to please each other!) The Way of Marriage of the Will Smith Couple)

"It's just a joke, why take it so seriously?"

In the discussion at home and abroad, some people can't help but say that this is just "just a joke", take it lightly, why be so serious?

Let's try to think in this way, if you are facing a certain process of painful struggle, you are still struggling to face something that you do not want to be mentioned, you are openly joking without prior notice, and you feel offended, will you take it more seriously?

Yes, if this is not our wound, the person who hurts is not us, there is not a single one of us who is qualified to say, "It's just a joke, why be serious." Because the truth is, we can't accept this joke for Jada, we can't ask Jada and the people who love her deeply and understand her struggles to accept this joke.

We also have to ask, is it really a joke to sprinkle salt on someone else's wound, or is it a kind of harm?

In fact, it is not the first time that the Oscars have been presided over by controversy. At the 2016 Oscars, Chris Rock focused on racial discrimination, but also made Asian jokes. Jeremy Lin even spoke in response to Chris Rock, saying publicly, "Repeatedly laughing at the stereotypes of Americans who think Asians are digitally savvy and child labor, 'When will this change?'" Jeremy Lin said he was tired of "the mentality that the United States discriminates against Asians, but feels cool, very OK mentality."

Well-intentioned jokes should not challenge the boundaries of "jokes and verbal harassment/verbal bullying", and should not be "sprinkling salt on the wounds of others". If you want to put salt on any wound, you have to make sure and understand very well that the wound is no longer a wound, that it will not hurt the person/the group of people.

It shouldn't be hell. Because that's someone else's hell, not yours. Someone else's hell is not a joke. If you are the one who pushes people to hell, you can't expect such a move to bring you laughter and applause.

On the Oscars stage, this is not the first time that the host has made inappropriate jokes, and this is not even the first offense of Chris Rock on the Oscar stage. Critics "No Trace" said in his community that they should examine the academy's mechanism, "The Oscars ceremony is scripted, and there is a teleprompter to remind the speaker to say something, which means that every joke is approved by the academy."

If the Oscar Academy of Film Arts repeatedly allows inappropriate jokes to happen on stage, and repeatedly lacks the pluralistic communion (D&I) thinking of race/gender, people should take it more seriously, demand it, and look back at what systemic problems are there in the mechanism and composition of the operation of the Academy of Film Arts. This will make this happen continuously.

(Same scene plus screening: Oscar jokes stir up trouble!) From Taibai to Tainan "Aperture Project" tries to turn the tide: multiple and inclusive films can be shortlisted)

Photo| Tatsushi Images/Associated Press

Will Smith punches in the field: When the role of the "defender of the family" gets out of control

Will Smith, who began his acting career in the 1990s and subsequently became one of Hollywood's most fundraising stars and producers, finally won the ultimate recognition he had been pursuing: the Oscar. However, in the moments before the award, his emotional reaction and punch to the host chris Rock have become people's memories of this Oscar.

Will Smith went on to receive an Oscar for "King Richard," and later, when he received the award, said the following:

"Richard Williams is a staunch defender of his family.
At this point in my life, in this moment, I was overwhelmed by what God had called me to do in this life.

To make this film, I wanted to protect Aunjanue Ellis, one of the strongest, but also the most vulnerable, people I've ever met. I need to protect Saniyya Sidney and Venus and Serena, played by Demi Singleton.

All along, in my life, I have been called to love others, to protect others, to be a warm current for the people I love. I know that in order to do what we do, you have to be able to accept criticism, you have to be able to get people crazy to talk about you. In this field, you have to accept the disrespect of others, you have to keep smiling at the same time, you have to pretend that everything is okay and okay.

Denzel Washington said to me a few minutes ago, "Be careful when you're at the top: that's when the devil comes to you."

(Pause) I thought, I want to be a carrier of love. Thank you Venus and Serena and the entire Williams family for entrusting me with your story and letting me tell your story. That's what I want to do, I want to be an ambassador of love, care and concern.

I want to apologize to the Oscars, I want to apologize to all the nominees... it's a beautiful moment, I'm not crying for the award, it's not about the award. I hope to illuminate everyone at this moment, to illuminate the entire crew of "Richard the King".

Art is like life – I look like a crazy father like Richard Williams as they say, but love makes you do crazy things.

Thank you for this honor, thank you for this moment, on behalf of Richard, and the entire family. I hope the Oscars will invite me back, thank you."

The picture | stills from "Richard the King"

In Will Smith's acceptance speech, people also saw that his expectations of himself and the pressure on him as an African-American successful entertainer were "not only to tell his own story, but also to use his power to tell more African-American stories"; and the huge pressure of being his ideal "father role" and a "family defender" indirectly contributed to his violent move to throw Locke out of control on the stage earlier.

In a patriarchal society, the role of the father has long been defined as "defending the family/protecting the family", and on the Oscar stage, we do see such a role positioning, the loss of control, and the harm. Not only to Kryslock, but also to Will Smith himself.

No one profits from it.

Similarly, we also see another school of saying that Smith rushed to the stage and swung his fists as "a real man" and "a representative of loving his family". We also want to say that fist waving and violence are not the embodiment of the so-called real man and love of family. Being rude is definitely not a "legitimate act of love." Violence should not be allowed, whether or not there is any other way to express protest.

Even if the starting point is "love", slapping is still a violent injury and a mistake

His crying on the podium shows that he has collapsed under so much pressure, he can't cry, more is a complex emotion, he even expected that he may no longer be seen on the Oscar stage. "Love", who considers himself a "defender of the family", makes him make the mistake of leaving history in the name of history on the stage of the highest award.

In the name of love, there are various emotions, but the act of starting in the name of love does not mean that all are justified. We do see that his humanity, vulnerability, and mistakes as a human being cannot be justified even if the starting point is "love."

In his testimonial, he talked about being called to guard the family, the crew, and the people he loved, but he forgot that in fact, he was also guarded by these people. Men do not always have to play the role of guardians, many times, that will prevent a person from seeing, in fact, he himself is the person who has been guarded, defended, nourished, loved, and cared for a long time.

Photo| Tatsushi Images/Associated Press

And each of us, never, fights alone, and doesn't need to, alone, to slap out that angry slap. Instead of having to be a king to fight for salvation, what you can do is support the person you love, to show support and strength in the way you give him/her love—to keep her/him able to speak for himself or herself, to make people willing to listen, to invite people to act for change.

After this Oscar, I think we learned a lot. Regarding what is a joke and what is hurtful; we see that the Academy of Film Arts is still systematically creating a stage that lacks a sense of pluralistic fairness and communion, which indirectly contributes to the occurrence of this conflict, and is about to be examined; we also see the shackles that gender roles impose on a person, and the pressure and loss of control that comes with it; we see that it is equally important for a person to be able to see that in addition to being a "guardian/patriarch" role, he is also a person who is being guarded/loved.

At this year's Oscars, women fans take everyone to see why the thinking and action of pluralistic fairness and inclusion (DEI) is important, from self-expectation, family roles, stage performances, to the world's largest awards ceremony in the film and television industry, the specific implementation mechanism, the way of empathy, self-empathy and see others, that is the next generation of our generation, to work together.

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