Shupi has always been the most relaxed of all the people I know. As early as 2013, she published a whole book about relaxation, and I don't know if it was because she realized what the truth was at that time, so that she could still be a mother and a child, or as relaxed as before.

| of literature and photography, Katymama

That said, I also want to be the kind of mom who seems to be relaxed. You don't have to forget to take care of yourself in order to tidy up your children, you don't have to carry a bunch of things that you can't use at all, and you don't have to tell your children that you can't do it all the time.

If you don't use these, it should be much easier to be a mother, right?

Why make yourself so tired?

"Don't you trust the child, or don't you believe in myself?"

This group of self-questioning sentences that I am most familiar with has come again, so it is fundamentally back to the topic of my "can't put down", the children are in the primary one, I still think it is difficult to let go, but this self who always clings to it, how to loosen?

I decided to talk to Tang Shupi!

Shupi has always been the most relaxed of all the people I know.

She had published a whole book about relaxation before I got married, and I don't know if it was because she realized what the truth was at that time, so that she could become a mother herself until now, obviously she had to take someone with her wherever she went, or she seemed to be very relaxed.

(Extended reading: How do you calm yourself down?) Love Yourself Practice: Let Go and Relax in order to loosen from a tense state)

Image | Katymama photography

Relax, but it's not that you don't do anything

Now Shupi's daily work, in addition to various cooperation cases, let her continue to devote herself to her favorite paintings, there are also her self-created brands in the mother's world quickly become popular.

The reason for the entrepreneurship is actually that she does not want her paintings to be printed on things, she wants to make the paintings into shapes, try to combine hand paintings with handmade, and successfully create the unique temperature and recognition of the brand through weaving and embroidery.

In short, she said that she also worked very hard to achieve the current results, although it seems effortless, but also need to vent the pressure, right?

So the point is, have you ever noticed that when we really feel relaxed, it's usually not about not doing anything – it's about doing whatever you like!

Image | Katymama photography

That day I took my camera to Shupi's house and photographed her planting a lot of plants on the balcony (which help absorb a lot of human stress) and the evidence that she had nothing to do.

She said that doing housework is also something she likes to do, and she will cook when she has time, after all, it is very convenient to go downstairs to buy vegetables.

In this way, she really uses the time of each relief to produce a better quality of life for herself.

(In-depth interview: Mom is a magician of love| Interview with Jian Yanshu: Let the space of the "heart" grow elastic, it is my magic to conjure up more time!

Image | Katymama photography

Relaxing magic for mom: make decisions on the spot and enjoy the details

If you want to be a relaxed mom like Shupi, the direction of mental adjustment is very important.

Maybe it's a habit of work, Shupi doesn't draw drafts, makes choices and decisions very crisply, thinks quickly, executes faster, does his own thing, and does the same for children.

She said that everyone has their own problems to solve, even if it is the child next to her who is almost four years old, although her mother will accompany her, she still emphasizes that "his problem must be faced by himself", and there is no need to intervene, do not cross the line.

Image | Katymama photography

Shupi is very special, is that she likes to package and ship, from childhood to yearn for the kind of mechanical work that requires repeated actions, she not only loves to draw small illustrations, do a lot of small things, but also really love all kinds of small details, is a person who is afraid of wasting time but is not afraid of trouble.

I said, isn't it just right to deal with the children's affairs that are always anxious and annoying with such an attitude? I have to look at it and learn it!

My friend Shupi, a pressure-free mother certified by a masseuse with loose shoulders and necks, is living a happy and satisfying life of her own — very relaxed, but she never does anything easy.