Yuzu Sweet, a psychic writer from the business school, has overwhelmed herself because of her efficient work and has also suffered intentional and unintentional sexual harassment by her boss. In the face of these injustices within the system and the difficulties encountered in her career, how did she adjust herself and find an outlet for herself from repeated practices?
| Woman Fan Editor Haoting
Do you take on too much work in the workplace and often find it difficult to load?
As a working woman, I am often intentionally or unintentionally verbally eating tofu, but I can't explain it clearly in my heart?
Or have you tried to convince yourself, "As long as I climb high enough, I won't have to put up with this... after that?"
These tiring workplace situations are playing out in our society every day, and now you are not alone.
Psychic writer Yuzuko Sweet, like everyone else, was once overwhelmed by her work and could not be satisfied when she encountered sexual harassment — and how did she look back at the injustices in the system, use her own strength to create a pluralistic environment, and find a cure for herself?
Picture | yuzu sweet peel heart powder special
What exactly is the so-called "wanted job"?
Yuzu Sweet, who is now a body, mind and soul worker, went to business school when she was a student, and the campus atmosphere at that time encouraged everyone to enter the big foreign business and strive for the opportunity to send abroad, so she also ambitiously found a job in a large listed company after graduation, and really became a foreign business.
"I originally thought that life was probably like this, even if it was very hard and depressed, I also saw a lot of absurdities and unspoken rules in the mall, and I kept trying to convince myself: 'As long as I climb high enough, I don't have to endure these things after that, and now my patience is accumulating chips, and I can redeem the work I want in the future."」 」 」
However, there are still deep questions buried in her heart - what exactly is the job she wants?
"In fact, looking back now, I don't really know very well, but I vaguely feel that I have endured enough pain, and sooner or later I can 'become a wife-in-law' and change to a place that is not as hard as it is and can make more money - but now that I think about it, there is no such place at all." 」
Every job has corresponding responsibilities and pains, but the vague expectations at that time became the only motivation for her to survive every day.
(Extended reading: "How to find your dream job?") Workplace Psychology: Choosing to Do Things With Someone You Admire)
The workplace dilemma of "efficient workers"
Yuzu Sweet shared that whether as an office worker or a freelance worker, she has always been very efficient in doing things, and even takes the initiative to optimize the process, and does not like to waste time on meaningless repetitive things.
"But in the workplace, this behavior actually has more disadvantages than benefits, for example: I make myself efficient enough to complete everything before noon, but in the afternoon I still have to shut up in the office and pretend to be busy and waste time; If they are known to be doing things efficiently, their supervisors will be assigned more work, and eventually to the point where they cannot afford it."
This experience is also a dilemma that many "highly effective workers" may encounter in the workplace.
Yuzu Sweet also described that she had been in the company for less than half a year, the amount of orders she was responsible for was stuffed into the highest in the company, the psychological pressure was very large, and if she accidentally made a mistake, she might make the company lose a huge amount of money, and even several times after work, she ran to the park near the company to hide and cry.
Later, she moved to another company and still didn't feel that "efficiency" was the real advantage.
"Once when I proposed to my supervisor to optimize a process that was time-consuming, meaningless, and error-prone, the supervisor told me in private that he could not submit such a proposal upwards."
"Because the boss thinks that our workload is too light, it is possible to lay off the staff or budget of our department, so even if he agrees with me, for our own good, we still have to continue to do this." 」
Think of ways to be fast, think of ways to be better, and the final results are not good - on the contrary, those who do not think too much, how to do what they say above, and who have never questioned, look honest and hard, but they are the best to survive in the workplace.
Several setbacks in succession made her begin to reflect: Are some people inherently unsuitable for the workplace? Is it that some people's personalities are more suitable for doing their own thing well to receive case work, rather than gathering in the same place at the specified time and gathering in the same place, doing a good job of being assigned, but not necessarily agreeing with them?
Picture | yuzu sweet peel heart powder specialty
Bravely face difficulties and lay the foundation for a career of freelance work
Although she has the idea that she may not be suitable for the workplace, Yuzu does not know what else she can do.
At the same time, she also secretly blamed herself in her heart, was she too poorly stress-resistant, self-righteous, good and bad, etc. - otherwise why can everyone hold on, only she is full of thoughts about leaving, but after changing, every once in a while and not satisfied?
However, even if she is unhappy in the workplace, Yuzu Sweet is still glad that she did not go with the flow; She takes the mentality of "even if you are trapped here, there must be something you can do" as her motto, and constantly encourages herself to face all difficulties bravely.
"I've built as well as possible soPs within my purview, as well as a progress tracking system that anyone can see right away."
"I also noticed that the rules for sending mail were changed back and forth, other departments were easily confused, and they always wasted time on making up for the pieces back and forth, delaying the schedule, so they also established a clear set of rules, and no one ever called to quarrel over the delivery problem."
These self-trainings are very helpful for Yuzu's career as a freelancer after Yuzu Sweet, because freelance work is like running a one-person business by yourself, and efficiency and precision determine the first impression of others.
"A lot of freelancers can't afford to work as long as they work, or they mess up their cases. But I already have very good time course management experience in the workplace, so I can work with all parties happily." Yuzu's sweet face revealed a confident smile.
The novelist Neil Richard Gaiman once said that the three elements of freelance work success are "talent, punctuality, and good people", as long as you have any two.
"I don't know if I have talent, but the business training allows me to deliver as accurately as A delivery, and I have the ability to treat people and things, which may be the reason why I can work freely to succeed." 」
Picture | Yuzu Sweet Peel Heart Powder Specialty
Verbal sexual harassment - women often eat workplace dullness
Yuzu Sweet recalled that in a certain job, some of the company's old bird-level male predecessors, with fresh people in the company do not understand anything, the work also needs their help, so dare not fight back, will intentionally or unintentionally eat tofu and verbally harass the female fresh people.
"Maybe because the industry at that time was more traditional, the company relied on the expertise of these old birds, so it would not stop them, and would tell female employees to be patient, anyway, he didn't mean it." 」
"A few times I was made some really bad verbal harassment jokes, and I collapsed my face and didn't speak, and the old bird seniors would taunt: 'I don't mean that, why do you think about dirty aspects, it's your own dirty head, it's not my problem!'" 」 」
At that time, Yuzu Sweet deeply realized that women really often eat this kind of stuffiness in the workplace!
"Because a lot of sexual harassment is a pun, on the surface it sounds like it can be interpreted as nothing, but everyone knows the meaning behind it." If you fight back, you are afraid of being retaliated against at work, and you will ignore it with a cold face and be said to be small and dirty, and you will suffer losses no matter what."
Similar things happened repeatedly, which made her heart very afraid, did not know who to ask for help, cold treatment and ineffective, until she later left for other factors, she was able to leave this environment.
(Guess what you want to see: the proportion of sexual harassment in the workplace is as high as 51%!) For Bosses and Supervisors: 4 Steps to Creating a Gender-Friendly Approach)
In pursuit of diversity and inclusion, you don't need to be "strong enough" to qualify
Looking back after many years, Yuzu Thought that she had a myth at that time, that is, "I am not professional enough in this field, if I do not take care of my own duties, I will blame others for their behavior, and others will think that I have no position to speak."
This is indeed the weakness of many women in the workplace, thinking that they must exchange their dignity for the help of others.
In fact, a truly diverse and inclusive environment does not require you to be strong enough to be qualified to speak. But even if you're still learning, they can give you a respectful environment to grow.
"In other words, I may tell each other in private and seriously that I don't like the jokes you make, just think that I am too serious, but I really feel uncomfortable." 」
"Some people grow up in an environment that doesn't receive enough gender education and just finds it funny to make these jokes funny, but they're not necessarily really bad people." 」
When the other party receives your unhappiness, some people may relent, but if the other party is still the same, Yuzu Sweet will eventually suggest that true growth is like a big tree, you must thrive under the right soil, and leaving as soon as possible is the best policy.
Picture | yuzu sweet peel heart powder specialty
Three steps to self-healing in the tired workplace
Yuzu Sweet believes that the workplace is the place to show humanity - if the resources are sufficient, it is naturally easy to develop a high-quality environment, but when the resources are insufficient, all kinds of squeezing and unfairness will appear, because everyone from the low to the high, they want to get more living space by squeezing others.
"Taiwan's culture is that people with money and authority have the final say, and even if ordinary people have the right to choose, they will first touch their noses and persuade themselves to obey, because if they do not obey, there are more obedient and more willing to squeeze their own people to replace their seats." 」
Faced with the reality that it is difficult to change on our own, she stressed: "We can't compete with human nature, but we can practice taking care of ourselves first."
Remembering the tired moments in the workplace in the past, Yuzu Sweet will first observe what kind of subject she is hooked up with- because it can't all be the fault of the environment, and she must have something to adjust.
Although the problem may not be solved, but at least to make yourself comfortable in the situation, here are the three steps she shares with readers to self-repair:
1. Watch your emotions
Taiwanese are very accustomed to patience in the workplace, but using work anyway is like this to avoid their anger or frustration, in fact, just let the emotions buy deeper, and will not really solve, but may vent pressure on things such as buying things, eating food, etc., resulting in physical, psychological and financial health.
(Extended reading: The last time we met, we only talked about joy: why are we getting less and less happy? Four circuits that affect mood)
2. Watch what subjects you are being hooked up with
As long as there are emotions, it is usually some hidden subject in the heart that is touched.
Yuzu Sweet took herself as an example: "In the past, I had a very serious perfectionism, so as long as I was pointed out, I would often argue with the other party about right and wrong, but such arguments often wasted a lot of time and energy, and also made my relationship with the other party bad." 」
"Later, I realized that sometimes the other person may just give advice, or simply don't understand the situation. If I think there is no problem with myself, just explain it calmly, and I don't need to feel blamed and defend myself immediately."
3. Create fun for yourself
In addition to taking care of her heart by the above two steps, Yuzu Sweet described herself as quite good at finding a little fun for herself in the bitter days. For example, in the small corner of the desk, lay a beautiful flower cloth, on which you like stationery, crystals, and even raise a water weed tank.
"Whenever you feel tired from work, when you look up at this little corner, you will feel as if there is a space to breathe!" 」 Yuzu's sweet face was filled with a happy smile.
In the face of an unsuitable and unfriendly working environment, Yuzu Sweet, in addition to taking the initiative and trying to find adjustment plans that can be tried, will also absorb the nutrients of each self-training as a future transfer freelance worker, and achieve the purpose of self-repair through daily self-observation.
Maybe everyone's career will not be exactly the same, but the pursuit of playing to the best in the right environment will be the same. I hope you can also take the nutrients and courage you need from Yuzu Sweet's career story!