"Transfer Love 3" Dongzhen Love Long-distance Run for 13 yearsWhy did you choose to leave?

The third season of the Korean love variety show "Transfer Love" will be broadcast, just like the program settings of the first two seasons, the show will invite five pairs of ex-boyfriends and girlfriends after the breakup to live together for three weeks, during which they can freely interact with other residents and get along with their exes.

As soon as the show aired, the participant Duo Hui sparked a discussion because of his identity as a former member of the girl group. A few days ago, the program team announced the story of Duohui and her ex, and the shocking thing is that this relationship lasted for thirteen years, but no one knew about the existence of her ex-boyfriend Dongjin from beginning to end.

And the compromises made by Dongzhen for the relationship in the past thirteen years have made many people see that they are always sacrificing in intimate relationships. If you have watched "Transfer Love 3", you are also a sacrificial lover like Dongzhen, and you always love to sacrifice yourself?

(Screening at the same scene: "Transfer Love 3" will be broadcast! Review what the three pairs of exes taught us, Haeun and Kyumin: The pace of love and departure is not equal)

Stills from "Transfer Love".

Dongzhen and Duohui: From each other's ten generations to thirty generations, you are my first love, occupying an important part of my life

"From my teens to my thirties, you were a big part of my life. Compared with the participants in the first two seasons of "Transfer Love", Duohui and Dongjin have been in love for a longer time, and have experienced the recklessness of their youth, the wandering and confusion of entering society, and the calmness and peace after running for three.

The two who have idol dreams met because they participated in the performance at the same conservatory, and the two were high school students when they first met.

For Ta-e, it was Dong-jin who let her know what it was like to like someone, and even though the two of them didn't live close to each other at that time, Do-e still insisted on taking a long detour with Dong-jin in the car, "Because I wanted to walk together, I couldn't even say the excuse that I couldn't sit in other cars that were lame." It was the joy of teenage love.

Then the two became lovers, shared many firsts, and even entered the well-known Korean brokerage company SM together.

Stills from "Transfer Love".

Dongjin: I have been silently in love with Tae for thirteen years, but no one knows that I exist

Later, due to the company's love ban, both of them left the company, "That dream is precious to me, but Tae's dream is also precious to me, and it is no less important than myself, so I chose to leave." That was Dongzhen's first sacrifice, and because of this decision, Dongzhen began to sacrifice one after another.

The two who left the company embarked on different development paths, and Duohui made his debut as an idol, but Dongjin failed to do so.

He enlisted in the army and inherited the family business, even though he was concerned about the dream of an idol, but based on the belief that "at least one of the two must be stable", when Tae shines on the stage, he suppresses his yearning to become an idol. After Duohui flew solo, he supported without hesitation, and in front of outsiders, he claimed to be an agent and was always vigilant, so as not to let the love in his eyes reveal the identity of his boyfriend.

Watching her shine, looking at the stage that once belonged to her, once again, Dongjin chose to compromise for the sake of Dahui.

Dongzhen's abandonment of Duohui is in his eyes, there is no arrogance of quarrels, and the run-in is low, and he goes directly to the situation full of apologies. So, when love was only left with concessions and debts, in order to find Dongzhen in his life, he proposed to break up.

Stills from "Transfer Love".

My dear, do you also love so much that you sacrifice yourself like Dongzhen?

The separation of lovers is sometimes difficult to summarize into a radical mistake, a need that is too late, a lover who can't let go, or a wound that can't be repaired.

However, the thirteen years experienced together cannot be easily erased, Dong Zhen also once said, "It must be happy and happy to get along for thirteen years", but as a character who always gives in in love, he has shrunk himself too many times in the relationship in order to fulfill his partner's yearning.

After sacrificing again and again, although he knew that the time zone without Duohui would be difficult, from Dongzhen's resolute and resolute cutting of the line that symbolizes fate, we see that this time he doesn't want to sacrifice again, and wants to live for himself again.

(Guess what: does he still care about me? Can we go on together?5 Ways to relieve "relationship anxiety", no sacrifice is the best you)

Stills from "Transfer Love".

The need that I didn't say was that I didn't need it, but that I was just used to sacrificing

Dongzhen has moved forward, so what about you?

My dear, you who choose to compromise in a relationship are extremely attentive and sincere sacrificial lovers, such a trait, you are lucky to be loved by you, but you may give in and hurt yourself at the same time, because you always do not put yourself in the first priority.

However, those unspoken needs are not actually unnecessary, but only out of thoughtfulness, so you dare not open your mouth to ask, or compromise for a long time, you may not know what you want.

As Dong Jin mentioned: "After 13 years of dating, I never told anyone about my relationship, and after the breakup, I realized that I actually wanted to do that. 」

Stills from "Transfer Love".

When inertial compromise leads to sacrifice, how can we think about ourselves again?

Maybe your words of love are Acts of Service, and there is no right or wrong way to express love in this way, but if you try to focus on yourself before valuing others, listen to your inner voice, and make choices as much as possible on the premise of not being reluctant, not aggrieved, and not sacrificing, after settling yourself, maybe you will be more capable of taking care of your loved ones.

Don't worry about yourself first, whether it is a sign that you don't care about your partner, on the contrary, it is a responsible and conscious demonstration of giving within your ability.

What's more, you can also try to shift the perspective of the relationship when you are always sacrificing, and in addition to giving, you can also try to believe that your partner can take on you well and respond to you. Perhaps in the process of giving and receiving in this way, each other's hearts will have a better chance of being received and heard, and the relationship will be closer and more intimate.