"Talking to Xuanxuan" invited Xiao Zhiwei to talk to us about what he saw and what changes he saw on the way to raise his children as a single father after he experienced a divorce at the age of 40?

"If I wore a straight suit like everyone else, people wouldn't recognize me," he said, with long hair and a dashing pace, which obviously does not fit the image of the so-called management class of the public. Before handing out the business card, I probably wouldn't have thought that he was Xiao Zhiwei, general manager of inline Taiwan.

"Talking to Xuan Xuan" invited Xiao Zhiwei to talk to us about his role in his career, how he views his life as a single parent as a father, and how he changed his mind and turned everything in his life into a good situation.

Siu Chi-wai: Divorce taught me the importance of "communication" and "listening".

In the eyes of outsiders, Xiao Zhiwei, who has succeeded in his career, is convinced of the appearance of "success", and he feels that life should go on as always, until the sentence "Let's get divorced" broke the imagination and normalcy of life.

"At a certain stage of getting along, you can feel that your partner is not so happy, but at that time I felt that life was like this, and now I realize that life actually needs to create some little romance. Returning to single, as a single father, and looking back on the rupture of the relationship for a period of time, Xiao Zhiwei said that everything can be followed.

"I think that when people communicate, there are often mistakes, and what we say is not necessarily the same as what we need. And as love wears off, he also understands the importance of "communication" and "listening".

Wei Xuan responded with the word communication, "In this word, com is common, and the action at the end of the word is action, so communication is actually a common and consistent action. Communication in relationships is a topic shared by people, how to practice listening carefully in the relationship, and understand what the real needs of the other party are behind the communication, may be able to really promote mutual consensus, so that the importance of the other party can be equally important in our eyes.

(Gaying in the same scene: Communication tips to enhance intimacy!Identify 5 major communication personalities, easily deal with them without stepping on thunder!)

Picture: "Talking to Xuan Xuan"

Not as the general manager of inline Taiwan, but as a single father

The new role of a single father has brought Xiao Zhiwei a different experience, and it has also opened his eyes to unconscious bias.

He said that after becoming a single father, he found that there is still a presupposition in society that girls should bear the responsibility of education and childcare. "When I attended parent-teacher conferences, I found that I was often the only boy in the room, and the teacher often named my mother directly in the Line group. Because of the projection of society, he worries that these assumptions and unconscious biases will become secondary harm to children.

"I think he was with me through another child's life. Fortunately, Xiao Zhiwei's child was far braver than he imagined, and what he was worried about did not happen in the end, which also made him realize that life may be like this. As a single father, Xiao Zhiwei experienced the reality, but he also gained a world from a different perspective.

(Guess you want to see: Confessions of a single father: Identifying parental authority belongs to the mother is equivalent to agreeing that the father is not capable of raising children)

Picture: "Talking to Xuan Xuan"

Xiao Zhiwei: The past with no regrets has made me my current self

"If you had the opportunity to go back to the past, would you want to change anything?" Wei Xuan asked during the conversation.

Xiao Zhiwei said that although he was sad, he did not regret everything that happened, "If these things hadn't happened, I wouldn't be the open-minded self I am now. He replied so lightly.

This year, he adjusted his mood, and the appearance of forty without confusion was perfectly reflected in him. Faced with becoming a single father at the age of about 40, he thought to himself that if people can only live to be 80 years old, then he is 40 years old, and he has already passed more than half of his life.

Now he grasps the moment and lives this version of himself to the fullest, which is actually the best state, "Even if I went in the wrong direction in the past, at least I was only half wrong, and I didn't pay all the losses. After experiencing the first half of his life, Xiao Zhiwei after the age of 40 wants to get back the game rights that belong to his life, take off the polite mask, and face life truthfully.

He doesn't try to become someone else's appearance, he just does what he looks like, as for the difficulties in life, he doesn't blame the pain of the past, as Wei Xuan said, in fact, all happenings just happen Xiao Zhiwei used his life course to tell us how we can turn all happenings into good times in life, instead of calling them adversity, low tides, pain, and failures.

At the end of the interview, Xiao Zhiwei smiled and said that it was probably infected by Wei Xuan's warmth, so he was willing to share more content than expected in this safe environment, so that everyone could walk into his past and into his perspective.