Heterosexual male sex confession: I am accustomed to the world, the original to others are full of oppression

"I really want to see, you a big man is how to play a set of women's fist?" 」

This is the film "Ye asked" in a line, the North boxer to find Yong Chun Master Yip Man Challenge, Taketo before the war before the first couple of a few sentences is the normal, but how suddenly took the sex when humiliating people's weapons? The first time I saw this sentence appeared, I was puzzled by this bridge section. Abrupt and very.

I am a heterosexual male, some people say that the world is a large part of the design for us, we are vested interests, can not see the life of the operation of the rules behind the various deficiencies. I wonder when I began to become unaware that some of the people were limited by these inexplicable rules and I was not aware that I was being restricted.

I thought I was a free child.

Remember the national small one or two grade, school welfare clubs sell a variety of toys, so many years past, my most impressive toy is embroidery pictures. That is two plastic ring fixed a cloth of knitted toys, there are colored lines, cloth on the outline of Alphabet, as long as the red line on the cloth followed by sewing, thick seam full, the last cloth will have Lotus, lotus that kind of pattern.

At that time, small I sew in the corner of Cram school alone, stitch. Everyone next to each other play their own toys, the voice 讧 讧, no one noticed me. Suddenly the teacher in the noisy play noise in the distance called my name. I looked up, his face filled with astonishment, and now I could not understand what was behind his astonishment to remind me of my behavior, that I did not fit in. Embroidery? Or a needlework?

"Embroidery is for girls," he said, pointing to the thread and the cloth on my hand. How can you play this? "The language with contempt, with a few sound to strengthen the persuasive way of hollow laugh, each student immediately quiet down, look to me here, 32 students with the sound should be, say every word, straight to grumble my behavior." (same field Gayon:iphone 6S exposes sex discrimination: Men with rose gold is the mother?) )

What am I going to do?

I asked myself. Is it time to put on an awkward, shy, wrong, ambiguous look? Hurry up and sew up the needle? Pretending you didn't do it? Pretending that you have never been in a hot heart? I do not understand, this is obviously I think fun and fun to do, incredibly because people think he does not belong to my gender, and I should not do?

From then on, I seem to know that there are some things in the world are exclusively for boys, some things are exclusively for girls, the boundaries are clear, chiropractor oversteps more not. Thin piece of cloth and thin needle and thread and ever really can sew close to various gender gap? It's so hard to break stereotypes.

I gradually merged into the eyes of most people, forever and ever changed? It seems to begin to feel that something is not supposed to be a boy, though I always see the unusual light in the cracks of life, and as I get older, these lights fade away and I don't pay close attention.

Followed up, I can not tell whether it is a habit or to cater to the topic of male friends is always that some: sex, NBA, baseball, married, how to chase girls and so on, as if apart from talking about these, we will have nothing to say, so each other anxious in these topics rotation, until the dinner or relationship end By this time calendar month, until recent years.

"Why do you boys get together and talk about some erotic stuff?" 」

"I don't feel very comfortable listening to you guys talking about it." "At a dinner, a girl friend asked. At that time, I began to realize that I was accustomed to things, for some people is a kind of trouble, the original social expectations of my gender, has been leading the topic of the mainstream, hear no other voice, feel that the world should have only one voice. I began to rethink the strange logic of the strange world, seeing the pain of structural oppression on women, and the bitterness of being pressed on men.

This patriarchal society kidnapped the image of men, demanding his economic conditions, social status, height, intelligence and rationality, not to cry, more than one thing is the mother, hang a drop of tears is cowardly. But what if someone can't do one, or can't?

Perhaps, some male Sheng, cannot afford to put on the body sex frame of gown? Shoulders can not be carried, hands can not pick, can not pick up a piece of traditional men should be picked up the value of the nominal. So how is he supposed to live? (Recommended reading: don't cheat, we all have the mating conditions )

"Kung Fu does not divide the ages, the key is who is playing." 」

In the face of other people's provocation, leaves asked lightly to say this sentence. This is the way things are supposed to be, and there are so many things men and women can do. Under the traditional framework, too much emphasis on men should do or do some kind of thing, in addition to women, part of the male is also the victim, they face the two sides of the narrow force, can not fully meet the conditions of the traditional men, but also face the women of men in the gender equality of the various charges, flattening out, appear cramped Under the patriarchal system, all genders are losers. (Recommended reading: A study of gender impressions from biological psychology: Is women's scheming a patriarchal product?) )

I'm a heterosexual male, someone who has a vested interest in the mainstream gender framework, but not every man is really benefiting, and I'm just like the people who are telling me about my sex, and I have doubts about this arbitrary world.