Every Monday "If you Want" series, if you have desire, Why don ' t you just do it? See the world change together, women fans 2017 ten issues review!

2017 is coming to an end, looking back on this year, do you still feel the inner boiling?

A year past, you must grow up a lot, you learn to mature is facing reality, occasionally compromise but always do not forget to practice the ideal intention; you begin to face the choice of life path, standing at the intersection occasionally confused, then understand, each step has its meaning, all experience has created a unique self; Spent a year full of tears and moved, the tears from the world of love, this year we saw the social existence of the sexual abuse of the issue, we are indignant, eager to build a pair of gentle hands, to undertake the victims of sexual assault, and moved from these seemingly dark moments, some people would like to use their own strength, to become a glimmer, Exert their influence to illuminate the dark corners of society.

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If you want to see the big changes in the world that have been made by everyone's tiny efforts this year, bring you together to review women's obsession. The ten most important topics of the 2017 million readers:

I can't reconcile my pain. Interview Lin: "has been inserted, will not be drawn out"

April 27, 2017, "Fang Siqi's first love Paradise" author Lin end of Life. She said, "When you encounter pain in reading, I hope you do not think" fortunately a novel "and put it down, I hope you and think of empathy. "At the moment, women are obsessed with wanting to do more, and they want to work with their readers to move their emotions together, and think about how we can knit together a protective net and gently take on the survivors of falling sexual violence."

Strange medical daughter, beautiful baby, this number who is also, meet her said, I am a waste, I am a child prodigy of pain, do not ask me to answer, I am just a mental patient.

2017, Lin is a literary world burst out of a shore flower, the other side of the flower to go to hell, not collected, wandering in the afterlife, magic unbearable, so let her take root, became the flowers of the death. The other side of the flower has missed the beauty of regret, flowers and leaves in different times, like Lin Yi with a farewell to life grew up in that section. People say that this flower is like a demon has gentleness, let a person on the way back, see her red as tears of the flap.

Thailand underage male prostitutes: I am 11 years old, two times a day, I have no dream

A glimpse at the bottom of Thai society, photographer Omar Puhamphiroya recorded the status of underage male prostitutes in Thailand, and the desire for social reconsideration and sexual exploitation in Thailand is the problem.

Male prostitutes are a kind of occupation in ancient China, mainly for male service. Male prostitutes who offer sex to gay men are known in China as "mb" (Money Boy), while Thailand is called "go go boy". According to the 2004 survey, Thailand already has 800,000 child prostitution, although this is certainly illegal, since 1928 the law has provided for the illegality of prostitution. But because of increased demand from foreign tourists and inadequate government work, there are thousands of child prostitutes in Bangkok alone, but less than 100 are rescued.

Thai photographer and director of Olympus · Puhamphiroya, a group of children who have recorded the portraits of these children, has made the world see deep-rooted problems in Thai society. Most of these children call themselves heterosexual, only for money to sell the flesh, but the guests are male. Many of them have been told to have sex with men before they know how to sleep with girls. Their empty eyes, stung the hearts of many people.

The school is sheltering the classroom sexual assault case: Once raped my teacher, became the orphanage Dean

The humanistic education reading notes exposes the campus sexual invasion real event, facing the sexual assault victim's pain, we hoped that the society no longer heavily picks up, lightly lays down, if uses the system to handle the perpetrator, also will the victim's injury, is handled with care.

As long as no one, clock teacher will go to find small smoked, touch her, hug her, she wants to break free, always be strong teacher tightly pressed, unable to move. The little smoked asked him: "Why do you want this?" "The teacher said:" Because you are very well-behaved! 」

The feeling of guilt swept through the waves, and the little smoke was painful. She wrote a tone tactful letter, told the teacher to do so wrong, finally did not know how to add a sentence: "Teacher, you are not like me, will this?" "The teacher did not reply, but in the meeting tenderness said:" Of course, like you, will do it! 」

In the bewildering air, the small smoked ignorant thought, this is love.

As the days passed, the teacher's body approached. More than six months later, the small smoked in the gym office was violated by the teacher, also said: "I have been waiting for you 16 years old ⋯⋯" original clock teacher in order to evade the criminal responsibility (note), deliberately, long planned.

In the minds of the students, clock teacher optimistic and hearty, like to mingle with everyone, small smoked don't understand, how he would do such a thing? Isn't he the most trustworthy person? Isn't he supposed to protect me like a father? Why did he want to hurt me and make me so miserable?

"Handsome lady" fashion through: there is a gender, called the Swindon

2017 woman fan new column "Handsome Lady" from personal thought to body consciousness cutting angle, show you that she/they are free to cross the gender boundary in the fashion. Swindon, some say she is an elf, some say she is a hermaphrodite symbol, her existence, embodies the beauty beyond the sex.
I think the gender difference depends on what the viewer thinks. The focus is not on the party being looked at, but on how the viewer perceives the person's gender. --Tiffany Swindon

In July 2013, Swindon the risk of being arrested by the Russian authorities and standing in front of the Kremlin Palace in Moscow to take pictures of the rainbow flag.

Russia, which is full of malice and even murder, has just passed a decree prohibiting the spread of LGBT information, and the State has the right to impose large fines on fines or imprisonment. Swindon's move at this point in time formed a strong support for the Russian gay community and a protest against the Russian authorities. Her boldness caused a great stir and resounding on the Internet.

14 Photo show you know emotional blackmail: give in because of fear, not love

From a psychological point of view you know what is "emotional blackmail", the author of the 14 map to explain the formation of emotional blackmail, characteristics and methods of response, to see why they are always in the whirlpool of emotional blackmail!

Do you have a "don't want to do, but do it" experience in a relationship, work, or family?

Is there anyone who's been squeezing you, and you're afraid to utter it? This is what Susan Forward (2004) called "Emotional blackmail" (emotional blackmail). It means that there are times when we are forced to do things we don't want to do, in order to maintain our relationship with important people, to avoid being degraded and to reduce anxiety.

In our culture, emotional blackmail seems to be a natural skill (is this a Chinese light?). , it seems to be born, its advantage is to let our relationship between people more closely, the disadvantage is that we lost the line with family, friends, lovers, but also lost their own.

"Psychology selected book" read "emotional blackmail" why do you give your life to others?

To give you the psychology to choose the book, about the mood we always difficult to grasp, constantly in the same feelings alley lost. The way to solve the emotional cycle is to jump out of the old mind and talk to the ghosts of the past.

Why can't we say no to others? Because we value this relationship more than ourselves, because we focus on each other's needs and emotions, and ignore their emotions. When you use the "Do not reject" skill, in order to reduce the damage (feel like an online game metaphor), and then start the "rationalization" of the buff, tell yourself:

  • A daughter-in-law should have listened to her mother-in-law.
  • I just got into the company.
  • There are three unfilial, no one is big ...

If, from the standpoint of native psychology of Yang , when you choose the "Chinese" race to create a character, the gift of our race is to care for others, especially those who are close to you.

You can ask yourself: is Life satisfying others? What happens, so that you are willing to take your life to meet others?

The psychologist teaches you to jump off emotional blackmail: you have no responsibility to meet others

Understand the usual modus operandi of emotional blackmail and the reasons behind it, psychological tutor you find yourself, jump off the daily cycle of emotional blackmail, your life should not be brought to meet others!

The interactive cycle of emotional blackmail actually involves three very important elements: self-worth, guilt, and security.

In other words, as emotional blackmail, they are very good at doing one thing: belittling you or your ability (self-worth), causing your guilt, and depriving you of your sense of security.

When an emotional blackmail discovers that you are unwilling to meet his needs, he uses a number of ways to make you feel that your judgment is problematic. Even, they will make you feel that if you do not follow his way, it is your fault, because of your personality flaws, lack of judgment, too lazy, lack of ability ... they will use various methods to make you doubt that your "feelings" are wrong, that they are wrong, and that they will use various reasons to beautify their own needs to show " They are right. "

can the perpetrator and the victim reconcile? TED's confession: The 7,200 seconds he raped me

Sharing a TED lecture with you, what true stories will they tell when the victims of sexual assault stand on the same stage as the perpetrator? Let's start with dating rape.

Have you ever heard of a date rape? Do you know that according to the 104 annual statistics of the Department of Weifao, 20% (2000) of dating rapes for acquaintances, on average, 6 sex-threatening date rapes in sexual assault cases?

A recent TED talk, co-author of the South of forgiveness--the sexual assault victim and the perpetrator stood on the stage and told a story that belonged to their true story, dating rape never far away, taking place.

1996 Iceland, Thordis Elva know Tom Stranger,tom is an exchange student from Australia, 19 years old, Thordis 16 years old, two people are young, love holding hands. After a ball, Tom escorted Thordis home, and he took off her clothes and pressed her, not to say no.

Thordis think, this and she saw on TV, the rape is not the same, Tom is obviously her favorite person, regardless of her opposition will rape her, she counted 7,200 seconds of torment, tears slipped down, feel good pain, the body will split.

"Relationship Diary" Ching and Li Daren: Old school good, Love knows

"Relationship Diary" is a woman obsessed with the "single diary" after the content unit, there is no ideal love, only belong to their intimate relationship. Li Daren and Cheng and green, originally AH Love is Miss pain, just understand I love you.

Li Daren Love is very introverted, I love you do not have to be eyes and ears. Love is constant patience, is the casual collection of your smile, is to understand the process and green do not need to adjust the wine embellishment life, just old table beer, carefree grunt, she is intact as ever.

Cheng and green love is cunning, I love you do not have to have you. Love is careful thinking, if love always hurt people, I wish I can keep your childish innocence. Love or fool, will I do not love you, can and you long, there are too many dead men in life, just want a never start you.

Zheng Yi Nong x Yang Dazheng x Shandong: Home is not a house, but a recognition

woman fan exclusive interview Zheng Yi Nong x Yang Dazheng x Shandong, into their Yonghe home, look at home can have a variety of patterns: home is to accept each other's state of the place, close to let us feel close, far let us grow ourselves.
"This space is magical, allow different personalities, inclusive of all kinds of mood, accept any state." "Big right side spit smoke side to say, hear a bit of magic." Looking at them, I really believe that people are growing up, only slowly forming, many people escape from the heart, missed the entrance to know their own.

Big is with Shandong Lai on the sofa to see the film day, Yi Nong is in the favorite table, nest in the black work chair, the keyboard is hammering, sometimes drilling into the recording room, shut in inside one day; three people occasionally cook together, big is with Shandong to buy vegetables, Yi Nong is responsible for free white drink; sometimes, farmers listen to the dialogue with Shandong, from the side through a smile, "disgusting you." 」

Grow a family in the name of a roommate. What is home? For the great, the family is spiritual. "Home should not be limited by space, back to the home of Taichung, Shandong, I feel home, back here, is also home." Home through the relationship between the establishment, while living, learning, the mood of ownership, identity lifestyle, home was established. 」

2017 this year, full of a change of the year, women fans continue to focus on gender issues, but this year we have a sense of social vision, and we're starting to look at a lot of social issues of gender and sexual violence, and we start talking about and building the web as much as possible, looking to improve on the issues of sexual assault, seduction, date Rape on campus. , there are more and more people in their own life experience for us to open up a family and gender equality of diversity, from the social issues to the psychological state of the search, we also look at the practical understanding of the issue, more tolerant of the community, the frustration of their own somewhat excusable.

In addition to looking back on the top ten issues this year, women fans always look forward to using words and content to accompany you grow up, when you feel lost in life, there are always a group of people with you, setbacks and then strong.

Finally for you to organize the 2017 most readers collection of articles, would like these articles in the words, in some moments, gave you to pick up their own strength, I would like these words to bring you moved to accompany you to the next year, even a long time later.

"2017 million readers collection article five"

the path of high EQ: Have you ever heard of the emotional list?

The underlying causes of emotional depression are often not pain and frustration itself, but whether we hold a trace of "control". Like dog A, despite setbacks, we will not give up and continue to contend with the environment as long as we find ourselves in control (we can turn off the electric shocks with our noses). But if control disappears completely, it will be like poor dog B, fall into the state of giving up, completely give up, is called "Low tide"!

To get out of the emotional doldrums, you have to start from "Regain control"!

I love you, but I can't love too close to escape attachment: We love and we get hurt

You are such a person, eager to give the heart but not with the lover too close, if one day does not love, more than anyone to turn and walk away, you do not say too far from the promise of love does not believe forever, only the hope can no longer be disappointed; you always hurt others before the injury, your free and easy only to package their own fragile You still deeply love those who pass your life, but always in the happiness of fear of falling.

Sometimes you doubt, but want to love a person, why so difficult?

are you a highly sensitive group? Like to be alone, hate hunger, always be said to be too serious

Are you a person who is sensitive to your surroundings and other people's emotions? When you were a child, did others often give you comments that were introverted and shy? Well, you may well be the so-called "highly sensitive person" (highly sensitive, HSP), a trait that is common in society, but until now few people really understand it.

Dr Elain Aron, American psychologist Ai Ying, has long studied "highly sensitive people" (highly sensitive person, HSP) and scanned the brain of HSP with MRI. Dr. Ai Ying found that HSP was stronger than most people in hearing sounds, interacting with people and experiencing emotional fluctuations.

happy to love you more: Let Go is the best way I love you

I am brave because of him, he is happy because of me. We have told each other no less than hundreds of times, we are each other's life the most beautiful scenery.

But we finally broke up. Because there is a third party between us, the third party is not a person, but a large group of people, is in my dream, a generation of young people.

He flew to Taiwan for one months for me. But in that month, I did not put down my work, because I want to serve more people and to the evening, he did not understand the Chinese, in the days of life in Taiwan, he is very often feel lonely, and I feel full of debt. I want to accompany him, but never do. When I was in front of him because of the tears, he smiled and told me that he appeared in Taiwan to see my happiness, not to make me cry for debt. He said the words in a romantic and graceful manner, but I was more in tears when I saw him mature and tolerant.

"TED conscious Weekly" 4:30 up 21 days in a row: My 0 cost creates more time

Have you ever wondered why most people get up at about 8 to 9 o'clock and go to bed at 10 to 11? What determines the regularity of our lives? Filipe Castro Matos, a TED speaker from Lisbon, Portugal, is not a great behaviorism or psychologist, just like everyone else, but decides to challenge the existence of human life, he asked himself why we have to get up at a certain time, sleep at a certain time, Why does the society seem to have a set of norms and guidelines when it wants to study what department and what work to do? Are these the things that can be broken? Let's see what challenges Filipe opened up!

If you want to continue to be an influence that changes the world, invite you, and we remember the change of the 2017 world, keep it in mind, and in the future when you have the ability to make some changes, fearless becomes the light that illuminates the society!

If you want, why don ' t you just do it?