Did you grow up in a single parent family?Honey, even if the environment has been decided, we can still walk on the other street.Single-parent families never need to be pitiable.
" You grew up with single-parent families?I can't see it." This kind of dialogue is not uncommon in my life.
I usually only laugh with laughter, but I have questions in my heart:
"So, what do you think of children growing up in single-parent families?""
As a single parent growing up, I do face a lot of self-doubt and self-recognition, and that's when I was very young and I couldn't understand and explain.It wasn't until my age was growing, and I started to discover that it was a single-parent family that made me now, but it wasn't the same as any other child who grew up in a family of different looks.
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I have also caught the label of a single parent family, trying to make myself seem to be particularly vulnerable because of scars. Until one day, I also found that I don't need this label anymore.Faced with a friend's saying, "You can't see that you are a single parent growing up", and there are new ideas and understandings.I only hope that my story will give you the courage and encouragement of one single parent family, and give you a little thought and understanding of the sympathy and imagination of the single parent families. (Extended reading: Is that a fake?Taiwan label badgage )
Fragile, unsurfaced, and unsurfaced way to retreat
I am a very boasting person, and this, of course, is related to single-parent families.As I have seen my mother alone in the struggle for the family and the two daughters, I can speak of my own confusion and vulnerability.When I grow up, I have to be strong and pursue better, and not be allowed to be weak.
It's hard to imagine how my mother was riding a motorcycle in the hot sun and in the rain. It was hard to imagine how she was next to that time, working in the cafe during the day, and then going home to cook after class, and then after we fell asleep, she walked out of the house and went out to the fast food shop to clean up.The dark night is deep and small, I always sneak up from the bed, stand on my tiptoes, and get my mother's back on the face of the sun, and disappear from the alley's mouth.
These memories are stored in my mind, so I often measure the "limitations" that they own.In high school, when her sister was admitted to a private university, I told myself that the opportunity for expensive school fees had already been used, and I had to read the national, and I had to stay in Taipei. This was the most economical benefit for the family.When he was in college, he told himself that every month's daily necessities was to be earned by himself.I have given myself too much pressure. Every day I want to make a lot of money and buy a house, so that families don't have to live in rented houses in Taipei. In the city of bustling cities, they are constantly feeling restless and floating.
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A single-parent environment also affects my role in love, perhaps because I was independent from school and I was probably grown up in a family without a male, and I was always so emotional when I was in love with him.I used to say that when there was a personal fate in my life, I said that he was willing to unconditionally bear all of my weakness.As a result, the truth is that I was in the face of the lover, but in the face of my lover, I was so far apart until I found out that I was so far away from him, until I finally put my life's weight on him.This is the end of my heart, the way I am, and the long and long ending.
Every family has a problem that must be faced
Fortunately, I wasn't smart in the course of education, but I was really working hard, except in the social framework, which was a little faster than people of the same age, so much so that I now have the opportunity to turn around and think more.I have to say that my strength and the more frustrated my frustration is indeed from my mother.I once had a grudge against her, and always wanted to be, why, whatever I did, she always poured cold water on me, and she was so mean to praise and affirmation.It wasn't until my age that I started to understand that it was a way of cutting off a way of life for myself, and when I looked back, it would fall off a cliff, and people could only move forward.Otherwise, what will be the way?
So, as time is going, I'm slowly going to reconcile with my mother, and I'm also with myself and myself.I know that when Mom said those words, she really wanted us to be good, and she looked through the society and looked forward to us to be tough enough to fight it." It's better to be worse than never!"," This is your life.I used to gamble on these things, but when I saw that it was her way of life from the past, I chose to put more love and thanks in these words.(Sibling: Letter to Mommy: Dear mother, you can be less strong )
(picture source_CXiPm" target= " _blank"> Source )
This is my growth process, and this is my family background.One mother, two daughters, one dog, one of our family members grew up next to the label of the so-called "single-parent family".I did have a lot of ramming and injuries, but the scars are no different from that of any family.The saying that "a family has this hard to read" sounds like an unreal one.Every family has its own problems that need to be faced, and some are fortunate, less than one; some are unfortunate, and some are more.
I don't want to overthink this misfortune by saying that this is the learning and opportunity that the Lord has given us."What I want to say is how to detect and accept such misfortunetability and to find out what it is like to be the most balanced of this kind of misfortune, until we can throw down this unfortunate label, embrace the fact that you and others don't actually have a difference.
When I no longer need the label "Single Parent"
I used to enjoy the process.When I did a really good job, I wanted to tell people that I came from a single parent; when I had a boyfriend, I wanted to tell him that I came from a single parent, and when I was a friend, I wanted to tell him that I came from a single parent.And now I don't need to use this label to make people double the recognition of me, as if I were the protagonof the protagonus of the story, from the poor and destitustive hell up to the envy of heaven.We've been brainwashed too much of this story since we were kids.
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I know that there are 320,000 single-parent families in Taiwan, of which there must be some people who are not. Some people have never been. Some people have lived their lives forever. Some people do it themselves and others live for others.When a single parent becomes a fact, the child who grew up in such an environment can only choose to make the most of his own resources in the existing resources.All things are different. In the existing resources, the most likely thing is that the children of every family need to face the same thing.(Let's take a look at: 'best' for children, many choices for single mothers )
Finally, in the last few years, after entering the age of 20, I have tried to make things pass.
Because there has been no change in the past, what we can do is to choose to make our present and the future different.
of the street
I lost my despair.
I my despair.
fell out of my wrong
into the same street.
I fell in the same
couldn't believe I fell in.
I walk on the same street
sidewalk with a deep hole
I take a detour
I walk on another street
Autobiography in Five Chapters >
this first Portia Nelson for everyone.It's like a deep hole, and it's like a deep hole, and maybe it's not our fault that we fell deeply into the hole, and we couldn't get up in the hole.But we always have a choice, and if we keep going in the hole, it's our fault.We can choose not to fall in, and we can choose to take a detour.On the other side of the street, it will make things completely different.
And when I was involved in this, "You grew up with single-parent families?"I can't see it.The exclamation point is always there when I talk to the person next to me about the family.So, what do you think the single parent families should be?In fact, we don't need you to think of us as inspiration stories. In fact, we don't need you to use this tag to make us look special. In fact, we only need to be understood by you, without the need for you to comment and sympathize with too much.(Recommended reading: To treat others, are you empathy or empathy?)
Incomplete Household, Full Me
At every day of the day, the "incomplete family, complete my own" idea often appeared in my mind.
I do not have high intelligence, but I do not easily criticize or label others because I know that there is no such thing as pain in the world. Therefore, since pain cannot be quantified, it cannot be compared.Other people's suffering, we can never see it personally, but we can definitely try to understand it.I'm very grateful to me for being born in an incomplete family, so that the three words of empathy are almost like my flesh and soul, and no one can take it away.
A single parent family or a gay family, all of them are a family of real value in my heart.When people are outraged about the purity and beauty of a family of monogamy, I feel as frustrating as I am.The pattern of the family is unlimited, and each one looks like it's worth it, and it's the whole of them.Hey, if you're a single parent, if you're still hovering around the hole, try to forgive yourself, forgive your family, forgive all the facts and errors that can't be changed, and then go to the other street bravely.