Intimacy is not critical! Raipexia: Remember distressed myself more than dearly others

In love, do you know how to listen?

The first time to listen to Raipexia teacher talk about intimate relations, last year I love my good times, from the topic with the family to talk about the intimate relationship of love, looking at the Raipexia teacher on the stage to talk about, those who adapt to her struggle with several years of thinking in exchange for her understanding of the intimate relationship between the contradictions, those tearing and arguing the road, She walked several times in pain, until she came into contact with meditation, counseling, and dialogue with her inner self, and in the process of repeatedly perceiving herself and listening to others, she achieved today's indifference. (Recommended reading: Happiness is growth!) Spiritual mentor Raipexia: "You are willing to admit your shortcomings, you can find strength")

Listen to Raipexia teacher talk about the independence of intimate relations, is how self-confidence and contend, can let her know more than anyone who love themselves, but also than anyone willing to pay love to the world.

Love is not to criticize, to embrace the softness of everyone

What is intimacy from intimate relationships? Raipexia said that the first thing to do is without criticism. "When you start criticizing, close the door to the person you're exploring, and close the link to yourself," he said. We need someone to help you see who you are, and it's important to be honest about who you are, but you need a mirror to reflect what you really are, and that mirror is usually your intimate companion. 」

How to be in the face of intimacy, keep soft listening but not criticize, so that the speaker can have a place to flow thoughts and doubts? We have been practicing, how to be empathetic to each other, and I think the first step, is to empty their own ideas, to listen to the idea of a partner, to share with him the idea of the collision, the life of an outlaw, to their own internal digging, these processes, may be your thoughts iron, or to make your value pull, But the precious thing is that you have a mental intimacy by listening. (Recommended reading:"film straight hit" Intimate relationship exercises!) Raipexia: "To shut up in a quarrel is also a kind of love")

"I found something fascinating," Ms. Perry's tone Rose, "about 2% of the world's work teaches people to listen, but listening is something we practice, and that's why I've been teaching counseling and meditation for so many years, and while I'm on the stage, we're actually listening, even though I'm sitting here, are listening to each and every one of you. 」

Since listening is so important, do we really teach us to listen in our childhood life? Or is it just a mask of communication and listening, to blame?

This time, let's practice listening, practise the charm of listening, open our hearts and listen to others without criticizing, and you will get more out of the process of opening yourself up.

Let's practice listening, open your heart and feel real

Ms. Perry began to teach us to practise listening.

She gently and slowly, please the audience 221 groups, sit cross-legged and try to keep the same height. "Imagine you are a man without a head, and now please be aware of the sound of your mind, let yourself not criticize without criticism, please be aware of their own face is rigid or smiling or wearing masks, without criticism is only aware, if you feel that you are very tense, let yourself relax, you need now is not clever not success, is to completely open yourself up and feel the current mood. (Recommended reading: True maturity is learning to stop and listen )

With the teacher's intonation sometimes light, sometimes firm, try to listen to practice us, look from the tension and embarrassment, gradually stretched out, the heart because of this moment of quiet and soft up. At this time Raipexia teacher asked everyone to open their eyes slowly, to the beginning of the world in general.

"When you open your eyes, this man in front of you, he puts his life completely out of your face, the communication of your souls is now without judgment, you may have the same desire, have a similar life experience, may have been betrayed and loved, may have been trampled but also have a strong moment," some of the tears slipped, Accompanied by the teacher's guidance, some of the wrinkles were gently opened, "may never be a person willing to lay down all the good sitting in front of you, staring at you, such a listening is the most precious gift." Put the other side into our hearts, but also thank the other party is willing to share his own with us, now let off all masks, socialization, each other is a flower you are also a flower, not through the language, just exist, to perceive their inner. 」

"The Listening practice of love, starting with the emptying of self"

Dear, let us practise listening together, carry our life in the sight of another, and exchange our souls.

The first step, imagine you're a headless man.

The listening practice of love, first of all, 22 relatively try to sit cross-legged, keep the same height.
Close your eyes and imagine that you are a headless person, losing your looks, your social values, your subjective perceptions, and your awareness of yourself and others without judgment.

Step two, be aware of your emotional flow

Feel the flow of your emotions in such a stillness.

Feel this space, only the two of you sit, feel each other's breath, also feel, in such a quiet is not comfortable?
How do you feel when someone is willing to leave their daily busyness and make a blank space to share a quiet time with you?

Third step, earnestly stare, listens to other people's life

Then slowly open their eyes and carefully look into each other's eyes.

We do not speak, just feel this stare, feel for each other to leave the white time, with eyes to feel each other's emotions.

Step fourth, say what you really feel

After looking, give each other a period of precipitation.

Then put the feeling of just practice to say, whether or not feel embarrassed, uncomfortable, can be honest to say, practice listening to practice silence, practice, the heart to feel the other side of the emotional ups and downs.

The fifth step, feel good income from the heart

Finally, please dear you, the feeling of such a good income from the bottom of my heart.

This may be the first time you have left your space open to a person like this, and there is a person who leaves his life blank for you to say, or not to say, that he is willing to listen.

Sometimes silent communication, but feel more.

In fact, the practice of listening, sometimes not others do not want to listen, but we have been running away from such intimacy, intimacy is never easy.

Just more than 10 minutes of listening practice, I saw the atmosphere of this space condensation, a very close and very close atmosphere bulging in everyone's heart, the original open their hearts, seriously listen to others, reveal the true feelings. It ' s so simple.

"Bring your heart, open your space, you say, what is not important, the important thing is: I am listening, I am listening to you." 」

Tearing in intimate relationships: about love, we practice slowly

Raipexia Teacher's soft tone, the willingness to listen to each other's warmth into everyone's thoughts, the next time, about love and listening, try to start from their own practice.

"Sometimes, there is a deep emotional desire to share with others, but can not find a person to tell how to do when it?" "Before we practice listening to others, we often forget to take care of our inner voice, and when Mrs. Perry's share is over, a reader throws up such doubts."

"I danced, and in the dance my sadness could be released from it, if you can not find someone to talk, we should do, we can do is to take care of their own, more serious to perceive themselves, try to let the rational and perceptual of their own dialogue, return to take off the mask, clear the mood to hear their own inner voice. "(Recommended reading:" good Times hit "Raipexia: True love, is to know to let go )

"Sometimes it takes a lot of impurities to speak, and there may be feelings that want to manipulate others." Many times, we just want to live in a sad melancholy, only self-awareness can discover this thing, say more love their own way is difficult to really do, to accept their own state, is to let their own free life way. "To this side, I think of life is always hectic, when we chase distant goals, always forget to look back at themselves, listening to their own hearts confused, good dialogue with themselves."

Cherish the world before, remember to love yourself first.

This sharing, Raipexia teacher in a word to elaborate intimate relations in the independence: "Remember to love yourself dearly, than others love you more." A girl held her hand in silence and uttered her doubts about the remark. "Distressed yourself, in a relationship will not feel selfish, want to love their emotions but also afraid of others feel selfish have wronged themselves, want to ask the teacher how to catch the balance between this?" (Recommended reading:"straight hit" I Love my fan day: Your eyes and applause, give us strength )

When the girl said this passage, I saw Raipexia teacher full face, the girl still too late to say the whole problem, the teacher like to think of important things, "and so on, in you said this passage I think of a point, when the other party feel you selfish, ask each other more cherish who? "Listen, I have a kind of a wake-up feeling, when you accuse others selfish, not for their own sake, we have to think of more for each other?"

"As long as you do not love yourself, cherish yourself, you always have grievances, what will be more unfortunate than the loss of their own?" I think the only person I need to please in this life is myself, I always put myself first, but do I have to hurt others? I don ' t know! To me, to love myself is to tidy myself up and to be honest with myself. I support you to look at yourself well, because no one in the world is better than you to take care of yourself, so dear, learn slowly, we still have a lot of space to learn how to keep ourselves in intimate relationships. 」

Yes, we still have a long way to learn, how to maintain their independence in intimate relations, I hope we will always remember distressed yourself more than others dearly you have more, honest to face their true feelings, to practice loving yourself, like you are always desperate to love others like that.